Scott Wiese is a man of his word. But soon his friends will be saying that about Peyton Manning.

Wiese, a die-hard Chicago Bears fan, will legally change his name to that of the Indiana Colts quarterback. He signed a pledge in front of a crowd at a Decatur bar last Friday night, vowing to adopt Manning’s name if the Bears lost Sunday’s Super Bowl.

“I think I kind of represent all Bears fans,” he said. “Not that I’m saying they’re all idiots like me, but I represent their passion because I really care about my team, you know?”

This is why I rarely bet more than 25 cents!



  1. Mark says:

    At least he admits to being an idiot.

  2. OhForTheLoveOf says:

    I want this story to be permanantly archived so that it can be easily refered to the next time some jackass from the fratboy/jock social set starts shooting off his mouth about how stupid he thinks sci/fi nerds, computer geeks, or any other of the assorted Eggbert types are…

    And for those who blast others for being interested in celebrities, music, movies, award shows, or whatever… Football is an entertainment industry. To all the buck-tooth rednecks who fired shots in the air outside my Indianapolis apartment this past Sunday night – YOU ARE NOT ON THE TEAM – YOU ARE NOT A MILLIONAIRE SPORTS ENTERTAINER – YOU DID NOT ACTUALLY WIN ANYTHING – In fact, you paid $109.99 plus tax for a blue nylon jersey so you basicly just worked your poor blue collar fingers to the bone, only to turn around and buy snake oil from wealthy idiots who are actually paid to enjoy a life of leisure and comfort simply because they can run and catch a ball better than you.

    And further, football is so mind numbingly boring. It isn’t fiction or politics or anything… anything… well, interesting. Every game involves 11 guys lining up against 11 guys, who then charge each other, pile up, get up, walk around, pat each other on the ass, lather, rinse repeat… So I guess there is some minor interest in the gay community, but other than that…

    There is nothing wrong with people who simply enjoy watching sports. But anyone who bets their name… paints their body… spends hundreds on lisenced logo wear… etc…, is a fool.

    Now I know I’m being reserved… Maybe, someday, I’ll tell you how I really feel.

  3. GregA says:

    OhForTheLoveOf,

    You call it a bug, I call it a feature. Meh.

  4. Named says:

    OFTLO,

    Please, tell us how you REALLY feel…

  5. Jerk-Face says:

    2. “Every game involves 11 guys lining up against 11 guys, who then charge each other, pile up, get up, walk around, pat each other on the ass, lather, rinse repeat

    God, is anyone else getting turned on?

  6. Mark says:

    OFTLO- Enjoyable post (rant), as usual.

  7. jbellies says:

    I bet his full name will turn out to be Walter Peyton Manning.

  8. hoosierplew says:

    OFTLO – I enjoy watching Colts games. I enjoy wearing my oh-so-foolish jersey or my just-purchased Super Bowl Champions apparel to the office on occasion; sure beats the suit and tie I wear most days.

    In a way, all Indianapolis residents won this Super Bowl – our team is supported by local taxes. I help pay these guys’ salaries, I am helping build their new stadium, and I don’t have a problem with that. Just like I don’t have a problem subsidizing other arts & leisure activities in Indy. A city has to have a way to vent from time to time, right?

    Sit back and enjoy this one – it’s a good thing to have the Super Bowl champs in the city. It would also be a lot easier on your blood pressure!

  9. Mark says:

    “In a way, all Indianapolis residents won this Super Bowl- our team is supported by local taxes.”

    Really? That sucks. I hope your teachers, fire, police, are paid as well as these “heroes” of yours.

    Rah-rah

  10. OhForTheLoveOf says:

    #6 – Even though you really are a jerk, don’t ever let anyone tell you that you aren’t funny. I appreciated that quip.

    #7 – Thanks man… You get me – I’d pat your ass any day.

    #9 – So enjoy the vicarious joy of revelling in the victories of others. Hoosiers play no part in the athletic achievement of the Colts. They are simply the financiers of the playboy lifestyle these latter day gladiators enjoy. If you like football… fine. (Note: To Hoosiers – I am willing to tolerate your zealous fandom if you’ll please quit vandelizing the Darwin Fish on my van. I wasn’t born here. I’m from the 21st Century. Please act accordingly)

    But why am I paying for a new stadium? Why is any taxpayer buying a stadium for any pro sports team of any kind in any place. These teams are commercial ventures. They are corporate entities. They submit to the will of free market capitalism, and they succeed so well that they can award 7 and 8 figure contracts to players just to play football.

    If Toyota wants to build a factory near Indy, we’d cut them a deal on taxes. Good. They create jobs (and far better jobs that Hot Dog Hollerer and Beer Bitch) but we do not build them a free factory.

    Multi million dollar sports enterprises should build their own stadiums (or use the perfectly good ones that already exsist) rather than stealing funds from health, education, security, and the general welfare of the population.

    I don’t begrudge the players. They draw the crowds. They are paid accordingly. I blame the owners and the pussies in government who cave to the crybaby tantrums and extortion tactics. The say they’ll leave if they don’t get a new stadium. Good. Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out of town.

  11. Jeff says:

    >God, is anyone else getting turned on?

    Well…honestly, everyone knows that the NFL has the highest percentage of homosexual players of any team sport (yes, even soccer). I don’t have a problem with that, but if you ever watch a game you can’t help but realize that it is kind of, well…gay (again, no offense to anyone). This must be the reason why women enjoy watching football…kind of like while men will watch ice skating (well the women).

  12. Oil Of Dog says:

    In my lifetime I have seen 3 taxpayer subsidized stadiums built in Pittsburgh. It could be 4, I’m not sure. The Penguins are threatening to move if they don’t get a new arena. I am a taxpayer. I have never been to a Pro football, baseball, or hockey game. Did I mention I live 100 miles from Pittsburgh. Gives new meaning to WTF!!

  13. Angel H. Wong says:

    He should have gambled a Blowjob instead.

  14. Jägermeister says:

    Infantile.

  15. Mr. Fusion says:

    #10, Mark, excellent riposte. My hat is off to you.

    OFTLO, great rant. I agree with your social assessment even though I enjoy and cheer for the Colts. What, did you expect me to cheer for the little rich kids at Notre Dame?

    Scott Wiese, get an effen life. Or take Angel’s advise in #14.

  16. Floyd says:

    #9: “In a way, all Indianapolis residents won this Super Bowl – our team is supported by local taxes. I help pay these guys’ salaries, I am helping build their new stadium.”

    I’m a Colts fan–ex-resident of Indy, and my kids played Little Leage baseball next to the Colts’ first practice field in Indy. That said,

    First, why are the Colts being subsidized by taxes? Why are any sports teams being subsidized by taxes?

    Second, What’s wrong with the Hoosier Dome (or whatever they call it this week)? You sure don’t need a bigger stadium.

  17. OhForTheLoveOf says:

    #16 – Honestly, I’m glad the Colts won too. It would be hard to get any work done around here if all my co-workers were suffering from the deepest depths of depression. Grown men and women would be crying like babies, occassionally looking to the heavens and shouting “Why God Why”…

    #17 – One of the reasons is they want to be a Super Bowl host city. I oppose hosting any event that interfers with my morning communte.

  18. TJGeezer says:

    The critics make the best sense here. As for the name-changing idiot, gotta say Angel’s suggestion (#10) would have provided more entertainment value to the bar fly buddies.

    On the new statium demands, I wonder if they follow a schedule. For example, after the taxpayers build a new stadium, can the subsidized owner then depreciate the cost over time? Once depreciation runs out, that could be time to extort a new stadium. Alternatively, do team owners extort right after a team has finished high in the playoffs or maybe made it to the Superbowl? When local feelings are running high – that’d be good timing to extort a new physical plant.

    Don’t know if anyone has ever really looked at the timing of new stadium demands to figure out that aspect of the corporate scam.


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