It may be one problem airline security officials never envisioned — a passenger lighting matches in flight to mask odors from her flatulence.
The woman’s actions resulted in an emergency landing on Monday in Nashville of an American Airlines flight bound for Dallas from Washington, D.C., said Lynne Lowrance, a spokeswoman for Nashville’s airport.
Other passengers reported the odor of burned matches, but the woman was not forthcoming when asked about it, Lowrance said on Wednesday.
“Of course, she was scared and embarrassed but all the passengers had to disembark, all the luggage had to be searched, a canine team was brought in, and about three hours were consumed in sorting out the situation,” she said.
The woman was not allowed back on the flight and barred from flying on American Airlines, Lowrance said.
“Since there was no malice involved and the incident was accidental, she was not charged with anything,” she said.
Surely, none of our readers have ever faced a problem like this? Or, at least, came up with a better solution!
Barred from flying on AA? She should have farted a storm during her search. And then left a few “bombs” at the counter afterwards…
The picture looks photoshopped.
I heard this story on NPR Wednesday morning. It made me feel so much better after that Black Bean Soup we had for dinner Tuesday.
ffs, if the woman hadn’t the balls to admit what she did them she deserves to be banned imo
Really stupid lighting matches on a plane. She got off easy.
I have a similar condition, and eat accordingly to control ahead of time.
The best solution, is this amazing-space-age product.
http://www.gasbgon.com/
Think the exact opposite of the Whoopie Cushion. Fart away. It even muffles the sound. Machine washable.
FWIW, I asked for one of these as a Xmas present….sent my wife into uncontrolled fits of laughter. They I showed her the website….more laughter.
What’s not funny, I got the condition from catching the C-Difficile, a damn nasty bug. Very painful. Makes you completely lactose intolerant.
So now I’m like 80% of the world population that can’t digest dairy products.
I’m surprised nobody has invented a fart absorption and retention towel (F.A.R.T.) that you can sit on when in confined places.
I bet the technology is there. It just needs funding. If you have a fat ass, like republicans, you can arrange 2-3 of those.
Beano
That’s one of the reasons I love my motorbike… I can fart the hell of myself without feeling embarrassed or even uncomfortable… well, slightly guilty for the atmospheric pollution. he he he
It was a common practice for many women to light at match before leaving a toilet. Not so much now because few people carry matches. I had an Aunt who had a, “nervous stomach”, as she called it. The best I could describe her fumes is to imagine a Great Dane having eat a whole can of chili con carne. The events occurred with almost every step she took.
#3 says “if the woman hadn’t the balls…”
I just can’t stop laughing!
She should have been wearing Charcoal Underpants .
If everyone would get a dog, they’d never notice his type of thing. I have one dog that’s so bad that if you were downwind of where a tanker of liquid pigshit just crashed into a burning refinery, and he farted, you’d notice the difference.
There’s nothing wrong with a good fart. It’s especially fun to drop SBD’s while in line in a crowded buffet and watch everyone lose their appetite and try to figure out who did it 🙂
Gee, I let loose everywhere… Nobody’s ever thrown me out — YET.
I hope that this doesn’t start a trend, where people with excess gas will be ostracized. Flatulence is just a natural thing. People shouldn’t be afraid to let some gas loose in public. Heck, I’m not. Go ahead, pull my finger.
And as Ben Franklin said, “Fart proudly!”
What happens if you fart during a podcast? Do you cut the segment, do it over again, or just let it go?
I think all the guests should be allowed to blow ass, especially when they really disagree with something.
Why do I care? I don’t know. I can’t stop typing. I’m on autopilot and I hope I don’t get diverted.
ohhhhhh puleeze.
JUST FART!
i do.
just do us all a favor and yell out “SAFETY!” so we know.
sheesh.