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A woman claims she spotted a vampire on the road ahead of her and it made her back her car into a canal around 11 p.m. Sunday.

According to authorities, the woman was driving on a dirt road at K and 20 Roads near Fruita when she says she encountered the vampire. She says it scared her, and she threw her car into reverse, backing it into a canal.

She was not injured. Her husband arrived on the scene and took her home. Troopers do not suspect alcohol or drugs to be factors in this accident.

And the best part of the report:

They added that they found no evidence of a vampire.




  1. RSweeney says:

    At least she didn’t say she saw the vampire in her rear view mirror.

  2. Rider says:

    What’s up with the flashing disappearing link text.

  3. xjonx says:

    Not only are housewives bad drivers, but their bad lairs as well.

  4. Gary, the dangerous infidel says:

    Toyota will want to make sure that this story gets wide publicity, pointing out that vampires cause just as many crashes as any alleged “defects” in the acceleration systems of their cars.

  5. Steve S says:

    In an update, the National Council for Vampire Rights (NCVR) issued a statement today condemning the recent rash of “Vampires caused me to…” stories that have benn appearing in the news lately. “Vampires are being misrepresented in the press”. “We are not responsible for all of the worlds ills”. In a related story, a man is claiming that a vampire stole his job and entranced his wife to run away with the undead creature. The vampire in question could not be reached for comment.
    Vampires – The new scapegoat.

  6. bobbo, telling Vampires from Werewolves says:

    Doesn’t the fact that there was no evidence pretty much proof of the lady’s story? Vampires never leave proof behind, that’s how they roll. He must have just fed otherwise we would have had the only proof there ever is: two puncture marks on the neck before the person disappears.

    #1–RSweeney==excellent!

  7. What says:

    #1 – Excellent.

  8. deowll says:

    Before you decide that she is completely nuts or just a real bad driver remember the horse boy picture on Google. She may be nuts, a real bad driver, or she may have seen somebody out dressed as a vampire. Last and not least something half seen can easily be confabulated into something it wasn’t like a guy in a rain coat becoming a man in a black cap. I’d give it even odds on any of the above.

    If she wasn’t drunk she should have been able to come up with a more plausible lie and even if somebody was there I wouldn’t expect the police to find evidence of a vampire. What would that be? A blood drained corpse?

  9. sargasso_c says:

    In America, women suck vampires.

  10. Cap'nKangaroo says:

    Oh, to be the claims adjuster on this.

  11. yankinwaoz says:

    Is she taking Chantix to stop smoking?

  12. Judge Jewdy says:

    Her initial report was it was a walking dead person, this would imply a zombie – not a vampire. Zombies are real, vampires are not.

  13. admfubar says:

    actually she saw tom cruise as Lestat de Lioncourt, he tried to convert her to scientology… hell i drive like a maniac in reverse if i saw that in front of me. 😛

  14. In America vampire is the word i heard from w omen’s especially ..here the husband never looses his interest to carry her..

  15. Benjamin says:

    I could see the sparkling blinding her and causing her to crash. [sad trombone]

  16. skunkman62 says:

    women are stupid

  17. I wonder her husband said … would love to have neem a fly on the wall ;o)


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