With all of the spending we’re doing, you’d think someone would be looking at some of the bribes, er… payoffs, um… I mean subsidies we pay out to farmers to not be farmers of certain things they probably wouldn’t be planting anyway and to others would be a good way to at least present the appearance of reigning in… Ahh, who am I kidding. Here are a bunch of the more odd (to be polite) subsidies that have been passed here and in other countries.

Ink Removal: In 2002, California congresswoman Lois Capps successfully petitioned the Department of Justice for a $50,000 subsidy to spend on a tattoo-removal program in her home district of San Luis Obispo.
[…]
Feting farseeing groundhogs: The Wiarton Groundhog Day Festival was invented by some residents of the small town of Wiarton, Ontario, in 1956 to help out a journalist who had come to town, spent his money drinking with locals, and needed a story to justify his expenses. […] In 2000, the Canadian government subsidized the town with a $50,000 federal grant to fund the yearly festival.
[…]
Ragin’ 3-year-olds: In 2003, Iowa Senator Tom Harkin managed to get a $250,000 subsidy from the federal government to implement the National Preschool Anger Management Project. […] The subsidized program is aimed at those children who are living in high-risk environments, wherever in Iowa that may be.
[…]
Turning tricks to scrubs: The German government came up with a novel idea to solve the problem of mounting vacancies for nursing positions in the national health care system; fill the void by retraining longtime prostitutes and sex trade workers as nurses. German nursing and labor officials reasoned that those who had worked in the sex industry already possessed many of the skills necessary to excel in health care, including good people skills, strong stomachs for unpleasant sights and smells and little fear of contact. This retraining scheme is being financed with more than $1.3 million.

Hmmm…. Wonder if I could get a subsidy for bloggers who develop the newly discovered (by me) medical horrors Cramped Keyboard Finger Syndrome and Web Induced Squinty Eyes?




  1. Sister Mary Hand Grenade of Quiet Reflection says:

    I’d like a subsidy to study why these damn priests like me to dress up as an altar boy.

  2. daveg says:

    The scandal with Obama’s CTO involves a company headed by an Indian national that was receiving grants for being “disadvantaged” and “local”, but it turns out he was outsourcing most of the jobs to India.

    This is against the law and he is using your taxpayer money that was intended to create jobs here to send them to India.

  3. daveg says:

    Here is a link to the story.

    Computerworld

  4. chris says:

    The tattoo removal thing is serious. If you want to leave a gang you have to get your tattoos removed. If you don’t other gangs will assume you are still with yours and treat you accordingly. If your gang catches you they will probably kill you.

    The last, prostitutes to nurses, also makes sense. I assume a full health screen of the applicants. There are a wide variety of nursing positions, I would put them in one that didn’t involve pushing meds. Prostitutes would probably enjoy a job that was safer, paid better, and didn’t involve screwing whoever happens past.

  5. Random says:

    I’m in Ontario and I never knew that was the story behind the groundhog day festivals. Interesting

  6. k.g. says:

    Prostitute nurses? Finally somebody’s subsidizing my fantasies.

  7. Usagi says:

    I like the hooker/nurses idea.

    Should make a prostate exam a whole new experience!

  8. raster says:

    #5 and #6

    No doubt!

    Every nurse I’ve had to see couldn’t care less how cold the g-d whatever was.

    Sounds like a win/win to get the experience of a pro!

  9. nothankstrixie says:

    You assume too much I think….I`m sure there will be someone who will claim health screenings are `stigmatizing` or `unfair` to former prostitutes, especially for those who are minorities.

    Add to that the frequency of drug use among prostitutes and I`m sure the people at the top will be making sure THEY don`t have former hookers dispensing their meds.

  10. Mr. Fusion says:

    I’m sure the list is long. Very long. The problem though, as pointed out above, is that one person’s frivolous expenditure is another person’s serious endevour.

    Tattoo removal to remove gang affiliation is one serious method of stopping gang activity.

    Wiarton Willy is a national symbol in Canada and bigger there than is Punxsutawney Phil in the US. To the locals this is a big deal.

    Anger management at an early age may help prevent something more serious later on in life. No, I can’t point to specific aspects because I’m not an expert.

    etc., etc., etc.,

  11. Uncle Dave says:

    #10: But should government fund it? That’s the question.

  12. Paddy-O says:

    Give the gov’t unlimited ability to steal from citizens and you get unlimited waste. Only a total idiot would expect anything else.

  13. Benjamin says:

    9000 pieces of pork in the last stimulus bill. What happened to Obama’s promise to reign in pork?


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