A Norfolk farmer who was struggling to come up with a fearsome enough scarecrow struck on a novel, and terrifying, idea. Marlon Brooks modelled his scarecrow on singer Amy Winehouse – and says she’s scaring off the pigeons that kept attacking his sugar beet. With her trademark beehive and tattoos, and clutching a cigarette and bottle of booze, Marlon reckons Amy should win another award – for services to the farming industry. “The pigeons are terrified, they’re sitting up on the telephone wires too scared to come into the field which is brilliant. Every farmer needs an Amy scarecrow,” he said. “She’s the best scarecrow we’ve ever had and she’s doing a brilliant job. In fact she’s doing a better job scaring the birds than she is singing at the moment.

“I’d be happy to offer her a full time job if she needs one when the singing is over”. The 36 year old farmer from Ludham, Norfolk, came up with the idea of using an Amy scarecrow after finding his old traditional scarecrow was failing to keep the wildfowl away. After discussing it with his mates in the pub, one joked that nothing was as scary as Amy so the idea was born. Now she’s doing such a fine job Marlon is even thinking of making a Pete Doherty and Blake Fielder Civil to go with her. “They’re pretty scary looking too though I’m not sure they’d do as good a job as Amy,” he added.

Har!