I never thought about it this way before, but the way the Citizens United Negating Technology for Life and People’s Safety describe it, the Internet is not just a delivery system that work like tubes, it’s a PORTAL FROM SATAN’S MOUTH INTO YOUR EYES!!! Here are a few of their 9 well thought out and obviously well researched reasons to turn off the tubes, examples of the horrible, twisted things you WILL encounter there:

– THE INTERNET IS A PORN HIGHWAY TO HELL.

– THE INTERNET TEACHES YOU HOW TO MAKE NUCLEAR BOMBS, OR PROTEST THE GOVERNMENT.

– THE ONLY FRIENDS YOU MAKE ONLINE ARE NERDS, LOSERS OR PERVERTS. BECAUSE EXCEPT FOR YOU AND ME, EVERYONE ONLINE IS ONE OF THESE.

As promised, here are just a few of the simply shocking things that have happened to poor, innocent wretches who ventured webward:

“I was a happily married man – two kids, a wife, a mistress and an almost unnatural interest in strippers. Then, I got hooked on the internet. Now, I have no time or energy for infidelity, as all of my time is taken up planning family vacations and helping my kids learn about history using the enormous resources of the web. It has certainly ruined my fun.”

“I am a mentally unstable sociopath and pedophile who liked to prey on unsuspecting children. Now, because of the internet, everyone is only too aware of the dangers posed by creepy men befriending young children. It’s quite simply ruined my life.”

“I never believed the government lied to us, or wasted tax on frivolities like unnecessary wars or government perks. Now, thanks to the horrors of the internet, I have discovered the truth. I hate the web. I preferred living in ignorance.”

Please note that it appears this website’s owners have disappeared from the face of the earth since it hasn’t been updated since 1998. What more proof do you need??? KEEP OFF THE INTERNET!

Found by Uncle Dave’s brother, Don