DALLAS – A man who weighed 558 pounds when a Missouri judge prevented him from adopting a child he and his wife had taken into their home underwent gastric bypass surgery Friday in a bid to win the child back.
Gary Stocklaufer, a 34-year-old truck driver, and his wife claim a judge unfairly discriminated against them because of his weight in deciding to give 4-month-old Max to another couple for possible adoption. The infant from Arlington, who is related to the Stocklaufers, had lived with them since he was a week old.
This is considered the first case where a couple seeking to adopt has resorted to surgery in the increasingly prevalent practice of denying parents adoptions because they are obese, several adoption experts said.
Was: “unfairly discriminated against them because of his weight”
Should be: “discriminated against them because of health reasons”
“underwent gastric bypass surgery”
…. now the child will be better off so the judge did the right thing.
Obesity has real life consequences. Adopting a young child is a commitment for 20 years or more. Weighing nearly 600 pounds is not healthy for a human skeleton nor the joints.
Now they have done something in taking steps to lose weigh that will benefit both themselves and the child greatly.
True justice served.
THE END
/Smokers without the discipline to “step outside” (30% ?) should be denied adoption as an aside.
Agreed. Since he is a truck driver, I’m sure he is the money maker for the family so if he were to drop over, who would support the kid. The waitress wife?
If the kid was OK to live in the house since a week old this this is clearly wrong.
If they felt it was OK for them to watch the kid all this time then adaption should be fine.
Health issues aside they could have told him he needed to have his health in check before adaption and allow time for them to get that treatment.
Fat people make bad parents, but the courts seem to have no problems with drug addicts, alcoholics, abusers, Brittney Spears and so on.
#5, gq,
Very good points
Using this rationale, people who smoke, drink, drive too fast, skydive, scuba dive, police, firefighters, crab fishermen and soldiers should not be allowed to adopt either. They all live way too dangerously and there’s a fair chance that they may not be around for 20 years after they adopt. Only skinny computer geeks, the idle rich and super-models should be allowed to adopt.
i’m sorry, but it is just cold-blooded and cruel to break up an established family like this — lots of parents are fat, you gonna take away their kids?
go fix your own families — this is just plain wrong.
#2 the fact that you can sit there and pass judgment on a man who has loved and cared for this child for the child’s entire life makes me wanna puke, you should be ashamed.
so much for family values
#5 i have relatives that are obese and their families are happy and well-adjusted, my own grandmother was a very large woman who had nothing but love for us grandkids and our love for her bordered on worship
you people are fucking sick in the head and in the heart and in your soul
i sincerly hope you never have some overworked family court come evaluate your family.
i bet you a million dollars when that kid cried to stay with the only father he knew, your heart would change, if not, then you have no heart
#2 wow. pretty soulless there, chief, but i guess since you are perfect person it’s okay to dole out missives like that, hunh?
Grog, you misunderstood my post. I don’t think there is anything wrong with fat people as parents. It was a comparison on how the court is picking on this, when there are other far worse traits that courts ignore.
Read the post next time.
#13 — i sincerely apologize — this kind of crap turns my stomach and sickens me to my core and i went off half-cocked
5, 13 gquaglia.
Certainly there are natural parents who are: drug addicts, alcoholics, abusers. But show me where the courts have routinely permitted adoptions knowing this in advance.
Following your logic: Why have adoptions come before the courts at all when there are far more important matters for courts to be concerned with.
RBG
Interesting Case. Even if you are anti-fat, the facts in this case are hard to ignore what with the history and family relationships involved.
Still==grog==not much to be incensed about here. There is no “right” to adopt kiddies, so those wishing to do so should conform to the prejudicies of the day.
Everything else being equal ((which it isn’t in this case)), of course, morbidly obese fat people die young–leaving the kiddies without a parent. When no fat adopters are available, the kid should go to them.
“Established family”??
“His entire life”??
The kid is 4-months old, and he is only living with them because he is “related to the Stocklaufers”…
Why should the Court rubber-stamp an ad-hoc living relationship?
As RBG asks, in #15: “Why have adoptions come before the courts at all…”
And its not like obesity is something a Court would not concern itself with, before this:
http://www.workerscompinsider.com/archives/000403.html
http://tinyurl.com/z5hs7
Love your children: Stop using the treadmill to hang clothes on.
#15, #16, #17
not much to be incensed about here.
i disagree, the family court system is notorious for bad judgment in every jurisdiction (they’re overworked and underpaid) and when i hear about a man and woman who use what little money they have to bring foster kids into their home, and offer all that they have to have a child to call their own, lose that hope because of an inconsistent court just breaks my heart, and hearing people applaud the court’s inconsistency and talk nonchalantly of how the family deserves their loss makes me physically sick.
19–grog==when the kiddie gets placed with another family presumed to be a better placement, where is the concern?
The Stocklaufers have already had more than their fair share of rejected kiddies.
Where is your sense of distributed fairness?? (smile!)
You have to assume alot all around to actually “think” anything about this. Too many foster parents MAKE MONEY off the kiddies==not all, just too many. How do you know the kiddie is not better off where he got placed?
Stop being a doormat for the “offense of the week”. Grow up.
bobbo, sorry dude — i wear my heart on my sleeve, always have.
if growing up means growing cold then count me out.
21–Where’s the “cold” in wanting what is best for the kiddies and not assuming all kinds of facts to make it otherwise? Grow up on what you get emotional about.
state gets more $$$ from UNRELATED adoptions….in fact, I don’t think there are federal funds for related adoptions. Babies are easier to put up for adoption than older kids.
Seems like the judge was just doing his job…making more money for the state, to pay his salary.
We live in corrupt, greedy times, folks.
19 not much to be incensed about here.
Agreed.
The same Judge who approved of them being foster parents 7 years ago has had some reason – in the intervening years – to think his earlier ruling may have been a mistake, and doesn’t want to repeat that mistake.
You appear to be advocating for the family, which is fine, but I can’t make a rational decision without hearing the Judge’s side of the story.
#8 Grog
>#2 the fact that you can sit there and pass judgment on a man who has
>loved and cared for this child for the child’s entire life makes me wanna
>puke, you should be ashamed.
Care and love is not enough to raise a child. A 20-year commitment to take care of a child in the child’s best interest is going to require healthy parents that are physically capable of raising a child, not just this year, but for several years to come.
Grog, I have 2 children. I am speaking from experience, are you?
I have 2 childre
Ya! Fat people shouldn’t be able to adopt children!
Lets take it to the next level and send child services to rescue children from their obese natural parents so they can be placed in a healthier environment.
Clearly the obese cannot provide the care and love that children require.
Of course this would have dire implications for the American family since the Surgeon general claims “Nearly two out of every three Americans are overweight or obese.”
http://tinyurl.com/p7z22
Hey, I just realized… 66% of you guys are fat unsuitable parents ^^
#20, bobbo,
Once again you’re putting your foot in your mouth.
Too many foster parents MAKE MONEY off the kiddies==not all, just too many.
Can you cite ONE foster couple that made a profit off of adopted kids? Hey armpit, it costs money to raise a kid. Yes the state will usually provide money for the child, but seldom is it enough. Very few foster parents do it for any reason other than love and passion.
Sometimes there are foster parents who depend solely upon foster child grants. You will find that they are raising handicapped and special needs children which usually is a full time job. But, make money? Ya right !!! /sarcasm
Once you adopt, that kid is yours. While the state may provide some support, it is not enough to cover the costs of raising a child. The subject is Adoption, not foster care. To confuse the two and invoke foster care in place of adoption is moranic.
#25, HM,
Care and love is not enough to raise a child.
Very true, it isn’t. Ya gotta feed the little hungry mouths. Ya gotta wipe the crap off them when they miss the toilet. Ya gotta sit up with them when they eat green apples before bedtime. Ya gotta watch them strike out every time they get to bat. Ya gotta meet the principal when the little fart screws up in class. Ya gotta buy new clothes every year when the pants no longer cover the ankles. Ya gotta pay for the car repair where the little shit ran into it with his skateboard. Ya gotta help do math when you can’t add fractions worth a darn. Ya gotta support their addiction to a music collection. Ya gotta help them get their driver’s license. Ya gotta pay for them to see their favorite artist in concert. Ya gotta send them off to school.
Now, where is the guarantee that YOU will be there for the next 20 years to see them through all that?
Grog has raised some very pertinent points that should not be so flippantly tossed off as silly. Two years ago my wife and I were going through the adoption procedure. We put it aside after my accident because I didn’t think we could commit ourselves at that time. We met with several adoptive and pre-adoptive parents during our courses. Trust me, you don’t do this just because you have an extra place setting at the table.
“Ya! Fat people shouldn’t be able to adopt children!
Lets take it to the next level and send child services to rescue children from their obese natural parents so they can be placed in a healthier environment”
Well in Canada they will be doing bet your bottom dollar! No actually they are already doing it, be very careful what you wish for! No family is safe from the government!
http://www.canadacourtwatch.com
http://sarniasgun.proboards83.com/index.cgi