Richard Thorne grins as he waves his hand under a toilet paper dispenser in a women’s restroom. The machine spits five sheets of tissue into his grasp.
A year in the works, the electronic tissue dispenser is being rolled out to the masses by Kimberly-Clark Professional as it seeks to capture more of the $1 billion away-from-home toilet paper market. The company believes most people will be satisfied with five sheets — and use 20 percent less toilet paper.
“Most people will take the amount given,” says Thorne. Waxing philosophical, he adds, “People generally in life will take what you give them.”
Americans typically use twice as much toilet paper as Europeans — as much as an arm’s length each pull, Thorne says. The company decided the best length is about 20 inches — or precisely five standard toilet paper squares, though the machine can also be adjusted to churn out 16 inches or 24 inches, depending on the demand.
As they say in the article, call it a final frontier — of cheapness.
#61, I thought the connection between Bush and toilet paper was quite obvious. Bush treats the electorate like what we use toilet paper for and the electorate thinks Bush is what toilet paper is usually used to clean. And I don’t mean cleaning a Bush. Maybe we should change the name to Bush Paper.
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(from behind a closed door)
“Martha honey !!!, We’re outta Bush paper”.
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“Do we need anything at the store”?
Ya, get some Bush Paper. And not that Republican or Neo-Con brands. They both have splinters”.
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“God damn kids put WAY too much Bush Paper down the Bush Hole !!! No wonder it keeps plugging up”.
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(sign in store)
PLEASE DON’T SQUEEZE THE BUSH PAPER
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BP a house, verb-to throw Bush Paper over trees, hedges and across the lawn, a type of urban vandalism. BPed
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(News Headline)
BUSH PAPER STAYS THE COURSE.
Plugs Up Septic Systems Around Nation
Environmental Crises Happening Now