A Texas man scheduled to be executed today wants to die laughing.
Patrick Knight, 39, has been soliciting jokes on the Internet and plans to tell one of them before receiving a lethal injection, Texas Department of Criminal Justice spokeswoman Michelle Lyons said on Monday.
“He says he wants to keep his execution light,” she said.
“We’ve certainly had some people who have recited a poem or a Bible verse, some people who have asked forgiveness or who pray,” she said. “This is, to my knowledge, the first time anybody has told a joke as their last words.”
It’s easy to make light of death – if you’re a psychopath. I imagine the friends and relatives of the folks he killed in Amarillo don’t see any humor in this.
One last F-you to the people he’s tormented.
here’s one about another guy being executed:
what did jesus say to peter just before dying on the cross?
check it out, i can your house from up here
hahahahahahahaha!
EDIT:
i can SEE your house from up here
man, i can’t tell a joke
I heard about this on npr this morning, thought it was hella funny – this guy is my new hero – for the next few hrs anyway – then he’ll be dead and I’ll need a new hero
grog, here are a few old semi-related ones to go with that. Usually they’re best told around Easter.
Jesus walks into an inn, hands the innkeeper three nails and says, “Can you put me up for the night?”
I don’t care what your name is, you drop that cross again and you’re out of the parade!
How do you know Jesus was Jewish? He was 35; he was still living at home. He went into his father’s business. And, his mother thought he was god.
Those old old joke re-re-re-re-re-hashed, I’m really glad to hear this guy’s trying to keep it light. Death can be such a downer. Unfortunately, I can’t think of any jokes that would be appropriate for his situation. Perhaps we can modify a bar joke or two.
A guy walks into a chair … zzzappp … and dies. (Nah, doesn’t work.)
Oh, maybe he could make the joke that some comedian did about the alcohol swab before the injection. Yes, we certainly don’t want him to get an infection from his lethal injection.
Hmm… I’ll keep digging through my ossified brain.
Oh wait, from Woody Allen’s Love and Death, first scene.
All men go eventually. But, I go 6 o’clock tomorrow morning. I was supposed to go at 5 o’clock but I had a smart lawyer, got leniency.
Heres a little bit more info on this cold blooded, for no reason but kicks, killer: ((Amnesty Org–but first I found with facts))
http://tinyurl.com/2jcudu
Knock, Knock /// Who’s There
Boot to the Groin–“Best Wishes on your way to Hell”
Not funny, but made me smile.
He killed some people. Don’t give him the platform he craves. There is nothing funny about what he did then or what he wants now.
Tomorrow we can go back to arguing whether or not his execution has deterred anyone from killing another.
If he wants to die laughing I say gas him with nitrous oxide.
They should execute him by laxative overdose even if it is a really crappy way to go…
#10 – TheGlobalWarmer,
Great idea!! Who’d want to die full of shit? As long as we capture any methane released in the process and use it to power the prison for a few nanoseconds, I’m in total agreement.
#9 – Improbus,
I was about to agree with your idea first … then I read TheGlobalWarmer’s and had to choose that one as the better alternative.
bobbo,
Did you read those stats on Texas executions in the article you posted?
Now I know why there are jokes about Texas implementing the electric couch. (It’d give them parallel processing capability, seating for three.)
13–Yes I did, but already well known pre BushCo’s stint in Texas. I was ok with Bush and could have voted for him until I learned the following:
1. Rich boy, never traveled out of the country.
2. Rich boy, failed at every business given to him.
3. Rich boy, got in Guard to escape the draft.
4. Rich boy, jet qualified and chose not to fly.
5. Rich boy, party frat and coked out of his mind.
6. Coke boy, switched religion for coke.
7. Born again, smiled and giggled when talking about the number of people he put to death while gubnor in Texass. THEN and only THEN, I knew he would make a good Repug.
How many union members does it take to put down a convicted murderer?
50, it says so in their contract.
What does getting struck by lightning feel like? THIS!
NO2,
Laughing gas,
Poisonous In large amounts…
LEt him laugh that one off.
#8….Fusion….Funny you should mention the deterrent thing. I just read something with in the last couple weeks about a study done that says it does. I wish I could remember where I read it. I had never heard that.
The Aristocrats. Just be sure to work in an execution somewhere.
They juiced this clown sans joke.