Holy smoke!

A council is proposing to save money – and combat global warming – by heating a leisure centre and swimming pool using heat generated by the crematorium next door.

Redditch council in Worcestershire says it can save £14,500 a year by warming its new Abbey Stadium sports centre with heat from the crematorium’s incinerators that would otherwise be lost.

The council, which says it is the first project of its kind in the UK, is holding briefings later this week with faith groups, funeral directors and members of the public to discuss the scheme.

But some local people are concerned. Simon Thomas, of Thomas Brothers funeral directors, said: “I don’t know how comfortable people would feel about the swimming pool being heated due to the death of a loved one, I think it’s a bit strange and eerie.”

Council leader Carole Gandy defended the plans, saying it would save money and energy. “I’d much rather use the energy rather than just see it going out of the chimney and heating the sky. It will make absolutely no difference to the people who are using the crematorium for services…I think it will save the authority money and, in the long-term, save energy which is what we’re all being told we should do.”

Be careful about all that common sense stuff, Ms. Gandy. It will get you in trouble every time.




  1. bobbo, religion being made up can ALWAYS be justified by made up connections says:

    Every time a cubic meter of swimming pool water is raised one degree Celsius, an Angel gets her wings.

    Now who can be against THAT?

  2. Billy Bob says:

    The Soylent Corp. will come in and offer to fuel the heaters with more efficient Soylent Green, as well as take over the pool’s concession stands.

  3. bobbo, the evangelical anti-theist says:

    We do need to make “Green” our new religion. Imagine having a belief system that can prove itself by testing and observation????

    Holy consequences Angel Watt Saver! I guess we’re kicking that old Satan Entropy right where it hurts!

    Amen, and pass the insulation!

  4. moondawg says:

    #1. That’s the first thing you’ve ever said that I liked.

  5. bobbo, the evangelical anti-theist says:

    Hey! Thanks moondawg. You have very restricted standards though. Sense of humor with practice can be expanded. I actually make myself laugh all the time – private allusions. I feel like some introspection right now as I popped a beer for lunch. Care to say how I normally irritate you? In return, I won’t use whatever you post when replying to you–but I will against Pedro for Brains just for the cheap thrill.

    In a very real sense, I like everyone that posts regularly here. Why not, its free?

  6. bobbo, the negative pessimist rarely apologizes says:

    Ok, I forgot to except Alfie.

    Say Alfie: define: thoroughly.

    Ever see those charts on the number of progressive politico’s convicted of crimes compared to non-progressives?

    Alfie – why can’t you be funny like me?

  7. msbpodcast says:

    bobbo, the evangelical anti-theist in #6 said, Care to say how I normally irritate you?

    God, (pardon the pun,) where do we begin?

    I find your opinions would be valid if only you knew what you’re talking about; but you don’t.

    Dude, you really need to get your butt down to a community college and learn the meanings of words. (Or even just Google the words before you use them for their dictionary definition.)

    As our great leaders John and Adam keep saying <bwords matter.

    That means you would stop using economic vocabulary for political vocabulary and vice versa.

    Right now, you are just so much irrational noise.

    This is a waste as I feel your thought processes are lying fallow in a snow covered field, just waiting for the spring of your intellectual awakening.

  8. msbpodcast says:

    Hey, it makes sense… Why waste all those BTUs?

    I’m going to go crackle, crackle, crackle when I’m dead and no longer give a shit. (My whole family has been cremated and used up a whole lot less land that way.)

    Why not use the excess heat to provide useful ergs to some process that can use them.

  9. msbpodcast says:

    Simon Thomas, of Thomas Brothers funeral directors can go screw himself.

    I’d feel better knowing that I was going to provide some useful heat to my fellow citizens.

    (Who knows. I might heat up some hottie’s ass? 🙂

  10. Skeptic says:

    Heating a body of water with bodies of water.

  11. bobbo, the negative pessimist rarely apologizes says:

    Peepod–I really must object. The only wordplay you suggest that I remember was just yesterday (?) regarding whether or not a fascist government included the concept of a singular tyrant? On that issue, I provided Webster Definitions showing you were WRONG.

    I love words. I see that you do too. Our pas-de-deux should bring us both exquisite pleasure ((“and pleasure is my business……)). I think your characterization is WRONG and you are more upset by the fact of my disagreement rather than my illiteracy.

    Prove me wrong. What word(s) have I gotten wrong? And to give you a pass, and for my own benefit, if you choose not to go on a snipe hunt: save it for the future. I love nothing better than being corrected–just as you have been.

    Yea, Veerily.

  12. Dallas says:

    I like the concept but never mind heating pools.

    Using say, Rush Limbaugh as fuel should power a small city for a few weeks at least.

  13. God, also known as Allah says:

    You do realize, that I can’t do anything with charred souls?

  14. Uncle Patso says:

    I wondered if I had wandered into the wrong comment section.

    “Alfie – why can’t you be funny like me?”

    Indeed. He’s as dour as Jacob Marley and as monomaniacal as — well, I can’t think of one who is his equal in that regard, other than a chatterbot.

    The best defense is surrealism.

    “You do realize, that I can’t do anything with charred souls?”

    Does chard have a soul? Or is it neutral because it’s Swiss? Could a person barbecue with charred-soul briquettes? Or am I thinking of charred sole? Is that why my burgers always smell of fish? Do clownfish taste funny? Do souls burn? Is that what fuels Hell? Does God use the heat from Hell to warm Heaven?

    So many questions, so few anthers…

  15. Yankinwaoz says:

    This doesn’t make any sense.

    Why dont’ they instead make the ovens more efficient so that they don’t waste that much heat, which is lost energy, in the first place?

  16. bobbo, the negative pessimist rarely apologizes says:

    #16–Uncle P==well done. Imagine the depravity that would need to exist to make my posts funny? But enough about me, what of the few good souls that also find some humor here and there?

    Although when moondawg said he liked my post I assumed he meant funny and my first thought was “My God, he has just insulted the 95% of the people in the world who claim to be religious.”

    Dour indeed.


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