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“What do you mean, ‘put down the cub and walk away'”?
Bufford: I picked up that cub, and right then it maw what right there…
Cletus: What did ya’ do…
Bufford: Well, I took-off runnin’ and that old bear was right behind me, slippin’ and sliddin’…
Cletus: Oh hell, then what?
Bufford: I ran up the hill and down the hill and that bear was right behind me, slippin’ and sliddin’…
Cletus: Wait! What’s all this slippin’ and sliddin’?
Bufford: Well, If’n a bear was chasin’ you, what would you be do’n?
Cletus: I’d be shitn’ myself…
Bufford: Well, what do ya’ think the bear was slippin’ and sliddin’ on!
and Goldilocks said, “this one is too small”
It was the last time Brother Bear had his lunch money stolen; for that matter, it would be the last time anyone ever saw the bully.
“Keep it up son. We bagged 137 of these a-holes last week. They’re mighty ugly, but damned tasty!”
Sir, do you have a license to hunt bear?(said the ranger in a bear suit.)
dead meat.
ARMY: Be all that she can eat.
What do you mean by “am I wearing running shoes?”
Famous last words….
“Hey everybody look what I found!”
Canadian army slogan – use here: There’s no life like it!
PHOTOBOMB.
The one photo taken during the brief wildlife career of the man who would remembered afterward only as “Gristly” Adams!
An Army of… none.
“Dad. Why do you still have both arms in this picture?”
Bad genes leaving the human gene pool in 3,2,.nom nom nom,man that bear is fast.
Here in Russia – we can see the idiots in Alaska.
Darwin Award recipient in the popular “Feeding the Bear” category.
Shopped.
Homo Dumbass & Ursus arctos horribilis having an encounter in the beautiful northern climate of Alaska.
“…she’s behind me, isn’t she?” “….whoooooooaaaaaaaaa <SLASH!/rIIIIIP!/boooing!/………..
Dead man walking.
Actually saw a guy almost this stupid once on the Trans Canada hwy, swatting a bear cub away from his picnic table with a newspaper. An RCMP officer on patrol saw this and chased the cub off with a couple shots over it’s head and proceeded to tear the guy a new one. I of course was waiting in my truck for Momma to come out of the woods and eat him.
Natural selection in action.
“Hey Sarah, here, hold this for a minute. Say something witty to the camera.”
Mr. Dumass found a poor lost baby bear…….