A grieving couple jumped from Beachy Head apparently carrying the body of their five-year-old son two days after his death from meningitis, it emerged today.
The bodies of Neil Puttick, 34, and his wife, Kazumi, 44, from Wiltshire, were spotted at the foot of the cliffs on Sunday evening. The body of their child, Samuel, was found in a rucksack nearby.
Samuel had been discharged from hospital on Friday after it became clear he was not going to survive. He was allowed to leave so he could die peacefully at home. The boy, who neighbours said had suffered serious spinal injuries in an accident about three years ago, was confirmed dead later that evening…
An Eastbourne coastguard station officer, Stuart McNab, said coastguards on a routine clifftop patrol had seen what they believed to be two bodies about 400ft down the cliff just before 8pm on Sunday and alerted police, but it was decided it would be safer to wait and carry out the recovery the next day.
McNab, who was one of the first people to be taken to the scene by helicopter, said he had found the child’s body in a rucksack along with a second rucksack filled with soft toys and a toy tractor…
A spokesman for Dover coastguard said: “It is really horrific and incredibly sad. In my four years with the coastguard I have never known anything like this.”
I won’t comment further. It’s all too sad.
More stupid than sad. The whole point about being young and healthy is you can have more kids, adopt kids, etc.
Parents who are over invested in their kids rather than each other—something wrong with them.
Child with previous spinal injuries, and she’s 44, so maybe no future children.
They sure had a rough last few years.
Crushingly sad, bobbo. Be human for a second and try some empathy for the pain they were feeling for the loss of their son. So damn easy for you to judge them… I think suicide is not the answer, but they didn’t harm anyone else and they apparently saw no way forward.
Losing a child must be horrific. RIP
I’m sorry they came to this conclusion. Truly sad story.
@#1
People who haven’t had a child with a disability or debilitating injury, much less having to cope with the death of a child especially at such a young age, simply can’t understand the pain these parents must have been going through. From the sound of your comment I can only assume you haven’t been there.
Oh Christ, this is terrible. What an appalling tragedy.
I sure hope they have gone to a better place – but news like this reaffirms my disbelief in any god.
@#1
Obviously, you don’t have a child (or, at least I hope you don’t), though you should at least understand being human and having at least the minimal amount of empathic abilities that a child isn’t like an iPod, which you can just unemotionally replace when it breaks.
Parents who wouldn’t be devastated by the death of their own child, shouldn’t be parents.
Have you ever had anything invested in a child, bobo? Sad story, sad person leaving cold comment.
Maybe it’s just not fair.
Think!!!!
I know too many people who get over involved in some tragedy and they focus on only a part of their temporary “feelings” rather than get a grip on life by the bigger picture.
So, those of you speaking against what I posted at #1 think these parents are what?
Admirable because they loved their kiddie so much? So then, every parent who loses a kiddie and doesn’t kill themselves is what?
Just try to follow the natural consequences of what you think you are thinking. Do the same with the opposite.
Resolve and then make a choice. Don’t be silly and don’t confuse being silly with empathy.
Bobbo, you just reaffirmed what I wrote in #3. Crappy, callous, judgmental are three adjectives that come to mind with your writing on this topic. Regardless of the parents apparently overreacting to the situation at hand, do you understand despair? Do you understand loss? Do you have children at all? Bobbo, you really must not have children because a switch goes off in the brain that creates an immediate, intense connection when you have a child. The overwhelming desire to protect and nurture that child is so amazingly powerful, it actually explains parents overreacting so often.
Being a judgmental asshat over a tragedy is a cold, unfeeling, uncaring thing to do.
#10: Geez, are you a human or a some sort of calculator?
“Just try to follow the natural consequences of what you think you are thinking. Do the same with the opposite.”
It’s not about being rational though. Rationality is the enemy of emotions. Simply dismissing these two figures as “stupid” is callous. I don’t think anyone disagrees that killing yourself *was* stupid (or, at least, we all can agree it wasn’t the right choice). But just saying “these people were stoopid” misses the point.
As to what is the point? Frak if I know. Things like these constantly remind us that there *is* no point but what you make of it.
For the record I agree with you – these folks were stupid. But their actions move me to pity them, and in that pity then feel for them. I’ve never been a parent, much less of a child with a disability, and yet one can imagine such a loss, and pray that “There but for the grace of God go I”.
@#10
So, these parents’ grief is “silly”? Wow . . . ignorant troll is ignorant.
No one said they were admirable for jumping off a cliff because their 5-year old son died. We are all saddened by the situation that lead them to that path. Simple human emotion and empathy for the grief they must have been feeling. It’s not right that they killed themselves, but it doesn’t make it any less tragic.
That isn’t the choice I would make if my one of my kids died. But just because it’s not the choice I would make doesn’t mean that I condemn others for making that choice. One simply cannot imagine what was going through their heads unless you’ve been in this situation. I haven’t personally been through it, but a close friend of mine did several years ago so I think I can speak from some experience. When a child dies, to the parent it does indeed feel like the world has ended. As a parent, you should be heavily invested in the growth and lives of your children, that’s what your purpose as a parent is. When that purpose is gone, it’s easy to fall into the spiral that can lead to suicide. It’s not “silly”, it’s life.
Maybe if they had taken some time to reflect more or had family and friends close by to help, they might have made another choice. Most likely it was a quick reaction to overwhelming grief and depression. But because they made the choice that they did, it does NOT give me to the right to judge them as “silly”.
Now, please, go back under your bridge…
#13–Alex, thank you. If you try, you can make it.
#14–Andy==”It’s not right that they killed themselves, but it doesn’t make it any less tragic.” /// But yes it does, and thats my whole point.
#12–Alien==always at my best when I focus on the calculator part of my brain. It is the emotions that make us throw ourselves over the cliff rather than devoting our lives to finding a cure for meningitis, or in providing support services for other parents in similar situations.
Why does the truth seem so offensive to so many? ANSWER THIS: if you lose a kiddies, you should kill yourself. If not, then what are we indeed dealing with?
I know you all know about the 5 stages of grief and the recovery process from tragedy.
I know you all know there is no such thing as tragedy. Something happens, and then we interpret it.
I had two neighbor almost exactly the same. Both had birth defect fetuses. One family aborted and had a healthy kid a year later. Good happy family. The other family kept the kid, spent all their money and time at the hospital, got divorced, kid dies at age 3.
Who was smart? By being smart–who emphasized their emotional life?
You do know emotions are at play regardless of the decisions, but nonetheless, some decisions are smart, but others are dumb.
Think. Conclude. Act.
bobbo, you cold, sad, sad person. No one here is saying what the parents did was admirable. And yes there are parents who live their lives vicariously through their children, but this is not about that.
You must not have kids, or ones that you care much about because you must not understand the bond a parent has with their child, to put it in a manner that sounds like you might understand better, which has an evolutionary basis.
Obviously suicide was the worst way for this couple to handle it, but the rest of us have empathy with the possible emotions they must have been going through that brought them to that point. Not saying I or my wife would do this, but if we lost our daughter, I can’t even imagine what we would go through. Yes we are young and can have more children, but a child is not something you replace. I’ve been to an infant’s funeral and my friends, the parents, while young and did go on to have more children, were absolutely devastated. I’d bet they thought about ending it for second, because that’s the kind of grief that kind of loss produces, but they got through it and are fine today. Sadly this couple didn’t, and the rest of us HUMANS here don’t condone, but empathize with what hey did.
A personal tragedy. Not really appropriate for anyone to debate it.
#1 – Hey BlowBlow, are you really that much of a fucktard? ESAD!
To an extent I can agree with Bobo, though I think he tries to analyze things openly and rather than just reading the story and moving on, must troll for attention.
Honestly, everyone has a choice to do what they want with their own lives. Who are we to judge?
Sad story? Yes. Do I feel sorry for anyone? Nope.
#16–Mickey==was the action of the couple smart or dumb?
what puts a break on being dumb but thinking through such situations and finding the right balance? Let us all think through the challenges life presents us with so we are fore-armed with the intelligence to persevere. LIFE is all we have, and we only get one trip.
What is sad is the child died. What is stupid is the parents killed themselves over it.
Seem like simple straight forward facts to me. A few like you agree but then disagree at the same time. Muddled thinking.
#15
I’m thinking you views on rationality and emotions make you a single person, no? Because I know of no one who would ever put up with your type of reasoning for a longer term.
And I’m generally a rational atheist/humanist saying this, but I have healthy view on how emotions and rationality can co-exist. While clinically you can call their actions “stupid”, the empathetic emotional side of the brain kicks in so you don’t say something like that at the wrong time, and end up with your face bashed in.
Geez, you must be a lot of fun at funerals
Suicide should never be an option
EXCEPT for you Bobbo. Please consider it and the sooner the better.
Heh, heh. Time and place for all things.
If not on a blog, where to discuss and come to understand that emotions can be self destructive and therefore DO NOT DESERVE the respect that is appropriate at a funeral?
Ok girls, time for a group hug.
#20
It’s not muddled thinking, it’s nuanced thinking. Kind of helps you survive, because living in one extreme or the other, gets you no where fast.
#24–Mickey==and the nuanced thinking that helps one survive self evidenced by jumping off a cliff is what exactly?
#25
Wow, for a “smart” person, you seem a little thick.
You called one of my previous comments muddled thinking, and I defended it as nuanced, and yet you try an attach it to this couples suicide?
I also said that living on either end of extremes (emotional and rational) will get you nowhere fast, as subtle, “nuanced” hint that this couple ended up at the emotional extreme and got nowhere fast(which doesn’t diminish my empathy for them, since I can emotionally understand what they did, but rationally not justify it). I guess I was too nuanced, even for you.
I think these two should be canidates for the Darwin awards. A PURE act of stupidity.
#26–Mickey==yes, I was a bit sloppy on that.
Still, at #16 you call me a cold, sad, sad person but in the same post say “Obviously suicide was the worst way for this couple to handle it.”
So, like the smarter half of the group herein, you agree with what I am specifically saying, but disagree with calling a spade a spade.
I wonder who would have helped this couple the most on their loss? A bunch of respectful child oriented empathizers who reinforced their grief, or some iconoclast shitting all over their parade telling them to quit being so emotional and live their lives.
Maybe I should just sit back and be smug. Anyone who doesn’t agree with me on the same terms I have is stupid, should kill themselves, is inhumane, lacks sympathy, is childless and overcalculating. Yea, thats the ticket.
Oops===and is a troll. Lets see if I can adroitly sidestep this.
ALFIE—why does god take the innocent?
The problems with your statement bobo is not that you were suggesting that they were being irrational by killing themselves. That would be a redundant statement to make really. We can all agreed that suicide is not considered a rational course of action. Thats not the point people are trying to make.
The issue is that you are calling them stupid. That is not the same definition as being irrational. To call someone stupid is an insult, which is insinuating that you have scorn and ill-will for them. It is a term of derision. It is not generally seen a a socially acceptable response to people who were so overcome with dispair that they chose to end their own lives. This is the reason why you are met with negativity to your comment. I am sure that even you are intelligent enough to understand this?
Intelligence comes in many forms, and you are showing yourself to be deficient in the area of emotional intelligence. It might be something you should look into.
I’m not gonna berate you over it though and tell you thing like “show some empathy”, cause its not something you can force someone to do. I just think in your attempt to be ‘edgy’ and superior to those soft ’emotional types’, you’re just demonstrating how little life experience, and social eptitude you really have.
In the Middle Ages, it was said that the infant mortality rate was so high that it was common for married noblemen to name their babies only a year after they were born, in order to prevent them from forming close attachments or invest too much time and grief in children who will more than likely die before seeing their first birthday.
Would such an attitude help prevent present-day tragedies mentioned in the post above? Perhaps, but such a medieval approach to children will more likely than not be frowned upon today. Having known parents who lost children with terminal illness after caring for them for years, it is heartbreaking. But suicides can usually be prevented by counselling, and relatives along with friends can help grieving parents cope with loss.
More psychological and moral support could have gone a long way to preventing this tragedy.