Mayor Michael Bloomberg paid a visit to an apparently-disgruntled constituent nicknamed ‘Staten Island Chuck’ on Groundhog’s Day — and got bit for his trouble. Staten Island’s famous groundhog, Charles G. Hogg, inexplicably bit Mayor Bloomberg during his annual holiday ceremony on Monday, drawing blood from the billionaire. Said Bloomberg spokesman Stu Loeser: “It nicked his hand.” Bloomberg wrapped the cut with a napkin until he could check with his doctor. He was told there was no risk of rabies. The 2-year-old animal was born and raised in captivity and has had no interaction with other animals.
In other news, dinner was served at the Bloomberg Mansion…on the menu Groundhog Medallions in a Bernaise Sauce.
“no interaction with other animals” is why
it’s vicious. It needs a Mrs Groundhog.
Grounhog’s a nasty oversized rodent, but in this case I trust his instincts. I’d’ve bit him too, if he tried to hold me like that.
You drag my butt out of bed, early in the morning, out in the cold, a handle me roughly…
I’d bite you too…
Animals are usually good at judging humans.
I go with # 3.
Chuck heard via back-channel that they Governor was there to lay him off.
And the groundhog was heard to say (take your pick):
1. “Blech! I hate the taste of rat.”
2. “Tastes like chicken.”
3. “At least he’s Kosher.”
4. “One more parking ticket and I draw blood!”
5. “Mayor needs mayo.”
6. “Eating in Staten Island sucks. All the good food is in Manhattan.”
7. “I thought you said halibut. This is shark.”
That but smoking hedgehog never liked Bloomberg.
How does Groundhog’s Day end up getting celebrated in NY? I thought all that rodent fancy was strictly a Penn. state tradition. They had to have transplanted the breed to Staten Island. It didn’t waddle over there on its own. As if kissing babies, and throwing out the first baseball wasn’t enough fluff for the mayor to do. New York has to borrow other states’ loony observances. Do they have their own Mardi Gras, too?
It’s nice to know that NYC’s mayor has no other more pressing problems, that he can spare the time to fondle a Groundhog, every Feb. 2nd.
I’m sure this must be anti anti-semitism.
If the animal didn’t have rabies, it does now.
lol you guys got me and my family cracking up thank you so much for the jokes
my fav was if he didnt have rabies it does now