A gay version of the Bible, in which God says it is better to be gay than straight, is to be published by an American film producer.
New Mexico-based Revision Studios will publish The Princess Diana Bible – so named because of Diana’s “many good works”, it says – online at princessdianabible.com in spring 2009. A preview of Genesis is already available, in which instead of creating Adam and Eve, God creates Aida and Eve.
The film studio said it would also adapt and direct the revised Bible as a two-part mini-series, The Gay Old Testament and The Gay New Testament, once it is completed.
“There are many different versions of the Bible; I don’t see why we can’t have one,” said Max Mitchell, who directed the science fiction comedy Horror in the Wind, in which an airborne formula invented by two biogeneticists reverses the world’s sexual orientation.
“I got the idea for the Princess Diana Bible from Horror In The Wind,” he added. “After the world becomes gay, religious people create The Princess Diana Bible, which says that gay is right and straight is a sin. Then they burn all the King James Bibles…”
But Mitchell said: “There are 116 versions of the Bible, why is any of them better than ours?”
Har! I look forward to the mini-series. The Bible is well suited to comedy.
That’s a double-har!
Where was it I read, “He sits on high and laughs…”?
Cool solution to world over crowding. You can still get your nuts off and not make anyone to feed you when your old. There goes the health care issues. Every problem settled with a little change in superstitions.
Worse idea than the Manga Bible where Biblical figures are replaced by robots.
So? If someone did that with scrolls concerning the Egyptian gods, Roman gods, Celtic gods, Norse gods, Greek gods, Aztec gods, Navajo gods or whatnot…no one here would care. So it kinda taunts the ancient Jewish god(s). It’s not like one out of hundreds of silly magical superstitions around the world is REALLY true and ALL the others are false. They’re just silly stories to make used to explain the world before we knew what lightening was or what those funny twinkling lights in the sky were. Do NOT SERIOUSLY waste a day debating a magical invisible sky being which no one can see, hear or prove…LOL. We have REAL problems to deal with people! Grow up!
#5 Remember this conversation when you wake up before Him.
The only bitter character in the Bible is God because none of his plans worked the way he wanted to.
Expect riots from fundamentalist Christians over this. Expect the publisher to be firebombed. Expect calls for the author(s) to be charged with blasphemy. Expect a few killings.
Brace yourselves for it, because we all know that fundamentalist Christians are no different than fundamentalist Muslims.
#8, Angel,
Exactly !!!
#7, peehead,
Yup. Trolling again.
So, how is the weather down there in Cuba? Any hurricanes come through lately?
I thought the Bible was already gay – all that stuff about “love your fellow man…”
When’s the gay Koran going to be available?
#6, yeah, I’m sure he’s real scared to wake up before your make-believe, invisible friend who has such low self esteem he demands constant worship!
#13 Well you’ll be standing next to him, 🙂
Just who do you think we’re talking about?
I’m going to be with the Flying Spaghetti Monster when I die, because there is just as much evidence of his existence as there is for any other god. Which is to say none.
Adam and Eve had two sons, Cain and Abel. The end.
I don’t see the Aida and Eve version as any sillier.
The gay bible has a lot of fringe. Go figure.
“Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools …”
Romans 1:21-22
#14 – Stinker,
#13 Well you’ll be standing next to him, 🙂
Just who do you think we’re talking about?
Nobodady?
Seriously, I expect my experience of death to be exactly the same as my experience for the 13.7 billion years before my life.
On what do you base any alternate expectation?
Fear?
#17 – James Hill
>>The gay bible has a lot of fringe. Go figure.
That looks more like crocheting than fringe.
Your adoration of my superior craft knowledge is noted.
#18 – Matt Garrett,
The bible does not prove the existence of god. Sorry.
In fact, given the great many contradictions in the bible, it may be active proof that either god does not exist or is far from perfect.
Contradictions in the Bible
I disagree there are many different “versions” of the bible. There are very many different translations.
Anybody can make stuff up and call it a bible but unless it is “based on” some original text, made up does not make it a bible.
My favorite example is the commandment not to kill. Evidently, the earliest edition of the bible we have uses a word that can legitimately be translated as either “kill” or “murder.” And today, some bibles say “Thou shalt not kill.” while others say “Thou shalt not murder.” Two completely different commandments. What is the holy word of God? No one knows.
So, there can be no legitimate gay bible. Gays can create their own new “good book” but it won’t be the bible or a version of it.
#23 – peehead,
Yup. Trolling again.
#20 – As is your latent homosexuality. Hell, my wife runs a daytime talk show and I didn’t even know that.
A gay world would be a disaster. We need breeders to keep producing the steady stream of young American consumers that God has come to love so much. That’s why the Bible rejects the homosexuality that would reverse population growth, resulting in a declining consumer base.
At least I’m pretty sure that’s why.
#27–Gary==actually, the last few articles I have seen regarding the genetic basis for homosexuality say it is an artifact of the same small group of proteins that INCREASES the fecundity of the human species. That is consistent with why 4-10% of population is gay across time and across cultures. “Proof” of its natural genetic non-free choice basis. It even enhances species success in a competitive environment.
Clever engineering by the god one.
#25 – Angry James
>>As is your latent homosexuality.
Tee hee! Name calling! From the self-proclaimed Great One.
O, how the mighty have fallen. You’re like the Michael Jackson of dvorak dot org slash blog.
My “latent homosexuality”! Titter titter! Giggle giggle!
“The total absence of humor from the Bible is one of the most singular things in all literature.” –
Alfred North Whitehead
bobbo said, on December 2nd, 2008 at 9:08 am
So, there can be no legitimate gay bible. Gays can create their own new “good book” but it won’t be the bible or a version of it
– That’s sort of like the gay marriage?
it’s a marriage, but not really.
it’s a bible, but not really.
pththththffffft.
#22 – bobbo,
I disagree there are many different “versions” of the bible. There are very many different translations.
Anybody can make stuff up and call it a bible but unless it is “based on” some original text, made up does not make it a bible.
My favorite example is the commandment not to kill. Evidently, the earliest edition of the bible we have uses a word that can legitimately be translated as either “kill” or “murder.” And today, some bibles say “Thou shalt not kill.” while others say “Thou shalt not murder.” Two completely different commandments. What is the holy word of God? No one knows.
So, there can be no legitimate gay bible. Gays can create their own new “good book” but it won’t be the bible or a version of it.
I disagree. People wrote the first bible. People wrote the sequel. People can write a new one. All are equally valid works of fiction, as are the stories of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and The Silmarillion.
#32 – Me,
Further, just as there are two movies called The Thomas Crown Affair and two movies called Oceans 11, in both cases with the newer one being significantly different and IMHO, better, perhaps the Gay Bible will be better than the original.