“What do you do all day?” is a question Anne Marie Davis, 34, says she gets a lot.
Stay-at-home wives represent a growing niche, according to the author of “The Secrets of Happily Married Women.”
Davis, who lives in Lewisville, Texas, isn’t a mother, nor does she telecommute. She is a stay-at-home wife, which makes her something of a pioneer in the post-feminist world.
Ten years ago, she was an “overwhelmed” high school English teacher. “I didn’t have time for my husband, ” she says, “and I didn’t have a life.”
She presented the idea of staying home to her husband, a Web engineer. “I told him it was something I wanted to do, and he supported it. It was a great relief.”
Dr. Scott Haltzman, author of “The Secrets of Happily Married Women,” says stay-at-home wives constitute a growing niche. “In the past few years, many women who are well educated and trained for career tracks have decided instead to stay at home,” he says. While his research is ongoing, he estimates that more than 10 percent of the 650 women he’s interviewed who choose to stay home are childless.Daniel Buccino, a Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine clinical social worker and psychotherapist, says stay-at-home wives are the latest “status symbols.”
“It says, ‘We make enough money that we both don’t need to work outside the home,'” he says. “And especially with the recent economic pressures, a stay-at-home spouse is often an extreme and visible luxury.”
Congratulations, geniuses, you figured out what millions of smart men and women have known for years – working sucks. You get dinged a few points for feeling guilty though.
My sister figured it out get a job work 80 hours a week make your money. Than get married have two kids and retire before you hit 40.
#28 has it right. He plays offense. She plays defense. As a team it works well.
I was married 6 years, no kids, with a non-working spouse. Here is how things went every 4 months.
Her: I want (insert expensive item here).
Me: Well, we can’t afford that. You don’t want to work, so we live on what I earn.
Her: Well then I’ll get a job!
[calls her ex-boss, begs to get her job back, it works].
Her: Uhmmm… I too tired from work to make dinner. You need to take me out for dinner if you want to eat.
Her: I need $600 to spend on new clothes for work.
Her: Um.. I got 3 parking tickets today because I was too busy at work to move the car.
So 30 days later, she brings home her paycheck. It is $15. I’ve spent $500 on clothes, $400 on parking tickets, $800 on dinners out.
Me: So why is your check only $15 after a month?
Her: Oh, I took advances and bought shoes.
Me: Quit! Your job is costing me more money than it is worth.
#8 – You got it. Why would anyone work if they didn’t have to?
come on guys – some of ya need to turn down the misogyny dial a bit. we are not ALL that vapid and aspire to a life-gig as a socialite . . .
i’m ex-military, have a degree, am part owner of a business, fix my own motorcycle and house, etc. – I don’t need no steenkin’ guy around!!! (well, except that lovin’ part. . .he he he 😉
#28 – I agree. Tell your wife I said thanks!
I am a stay at home wife. I got a degree in education and taught 5th grade for a year. Now I am my husband’s helpmeet. Yes, his Helpmeet. I am Christian, so I probably have different views as you, but the Bible says that woman was created to be man’s helpmeet. We were made from him. We have an awesome marriage now that I’m not stressed out, our home isn’t wrecked and we’re not fighting all the time.
The decline of society is BECAUSE the people who are supposed to be taking care of the home are not. Kids who have no mom to come home to are the ones that go out and find drugs, or gangs, or promiscuity. Think about it….think of the 50’s and 60’s when wives staying home was the norm. How does the crime/drug/promiscuity rate compare to today’s. It all started because of the feminist movement. They sold us a raw deal. We have become a greedy and materialistic society that puts value on monetary gains, positions in the job and material things. In order to live a lifestyle like that , two people have to work. Your family suffers. I want my future children to come home to a welcoming happy home with fresh baked cookies on the table, not be in daycare or be a latch key kid. My goodness, I feel so sorry for those children that only see their parents 4 hours a day (8 at school, 3 hours in afterschool programs) It’s just so sad.
What I would give for us to be able to go back to that time. And I’ll tell you something else…I adore my pearls and apron. They are my uniform and I’m damn proud to wear them.
Well, Id be more than happy to be a stay at home wife. If I didn’t have kids, Id most likely work,but otherwise I’d love to be a stay at home wifey. I don’t mind doing 98% of the housework (that would exclude traditionally male chores) or 100% of the cooking as long as I don’t have to work. There’s plenty to do-cook (I like to make breads from scratch so that takes awhile in itself), clean, go out and volunteer, read, research on the net. I am the kind of person who will always find something to do.