…if you believe. Eh?
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Tee hee.
For this to work, I believe you need to open the bible near the middle so as to form a funnel, then piss into your gas tank. If god approves, urine will be turned into wine, then your car just needs to run on ethanol.
God doesn’t expect to be the oil reserve of last resort, but he is willing to meet us half way.
This will work for sure.
Price goes down… proof, God answers prayers.
Price goes up… God works in mysterious ways, it is part of His plan.
You have got to be fucking kidding me!! All of the real problems in the world that need real solutions and people are going to take the non-solution to the relatively minor issue of gas prices??!!?
Wake up people!!
1) A universe in which there were a god to whom one might pray for temporary suspension of the laws of physics would be demonstrably different than the universe in which we live.
2) High gasoline prices are the only thing that is going to make “we the idiots” do what we need to do in order to survive. We have already demonstrated our complete and utter unwillingness to do something smart just because it’s smart. So, we need the kick in the ass that is high gasoline prices in order to do it.
And now, these fucking idiots are going to pray to god, not for world peace, not to solve world hunger, not to solve the overpopulation problem by attrition through infertility, not to reduce the effects of global warming, but to get lower fucking gasoline prices??!!?
Dammm we R stooopid!!
Besides, for those who really believe in a god who controls gasoline prices, shouldn’t they just accept that god wants the prices high now? Perhaps it’s a strange and mysterious way to work for the greater good. What happened to “thy will be done”?
How self-contradictory can one get? (Oh yeah, one could put a lightening rod on a church steeple.)
I recall pulling into an Exxon station a few years back to fill up my tank and Jesus came over to my car and started cleaning my windshield. He then demanded I give him some money for the job which wasn’t none to good. He used muddy water and a dirty old rag. The squeegie left streaks and everything. Am I going to hell? I don’t think I should ’cause he did such a lousy job.
Dumb, dumber, Evangelical Christian.
They need to pray to Allah, that would work better.
Dimwits!
Prayer won’t solve it…
I’m thinking of sacrificing a virgin.
That’ll do it.
Hey, what could it hurt???
But realisticly I agree with #4 MS for once. I wouldn’t participate in a prayer rally like this. I’d rather pray for something that really mattered. Something that would make a difference.
And then a thundering voice from above said,
“Do not look upon the Federal Reserve nor its Branches or ye shall be turned into a pillar of salt.”
#9, you’re kidding, right? What could it hurt?
If all the religious people went out there and became active in making something happen, becoming responsible for their own actions and their own destinies, rather than passively praying for it, and hoping an invisible deity in the sky would take care of it, the world would be a much better place. Why actually do something to make a difference when you can pray for it?
Dumbasses.
Jesus is up there thumbing through the bible and wondering, “where the fuck did I say I’d help with the gas prices?”
Well, it partially worked… Bush lifted the offshore drilling executive ban.
Now it’s up to Congress. And with the Dems controlling the House and Senate, jack will get done, so prices will continue to rise. No, actually, they’ll skyrocket once the idiots-in-blue start taxing the oil companies to eliminate their profits, making them pointless for anyone to invest in.
But will they take the blame when they screw the US economy even further? Nope, they’ll blame Bush, as usual.
All problems are minor and trivial compared to the cost of fuel. All problems are solved by more energy.
#13, no, the praying didn’t work. You imply causation where there is none. I suppose you think if the price of oil happened to drop tomorrow you’d say the same thing?
As for Democrats comment, you’re using a logical fallacy called the “slippery slope”. Try again. And the Democrats would have a hard time making anything worse than Bush and his Republican idiots already have.
13,
Even Bush admits that offshore drilling won’t fix anything anuytime soon.
He he… Ha.. ha BWWWWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
I prefer the idea of making it personal and going after the individual oil execitves. Leave tacks on their chairs, slash their tires, throw water balloons filled with oil at them.
Believe it friends, God has answered your prayers and has provided a solution to the high cost of gas..
GOD HAS GIVEN YOU LEGS!!
O.K. Put your hand on the gas pump and repeat after me…
I am We Todd It.
Amen…
Aren’t the high gas prices the result of Fred Phelp’s (Westboro Baptist Church) prayers coming true?
Go buy a HORSE…
when the State see’s ALOT of persons, starting to use OLDEr transport…they will HAVE to do something.
when WORK has to supply a location to coral and FEED your transport…something will be DONE(the parking lot is for cars, not GRASS)
when the city cant tag you for SPEEDING…
When the insurance corp has NOTHING to insure..
Somthing will be done.
when you dont need a LICENSE to ride a horse(slow moving traffic sign)…
when HORSE(drag) racing becomes POPULAR..
when a Goat cart with 2-4 goats, pulls you threw the town, and people look, and KNOW you dont need your Yard mown..
when a person NEEDS at least an Acre, to feed their animals…(Cool, more Lawn, room for the kids, Who needs pets WE GOT HORSES-goats- and a COW(and they ALL live OUTSIDE))..
#4Misanthropic Scott said, “2) High gasoline prices are the only thing that is going to make “we the idiots” do what we need to do in order to survive. “
You are so wrong there Scott. It’s not just the high gasoline prices that hurts, it’s the speed at which it rose which is causing inflationary pressure on basic necessities, which in turn is causing hardship for those who can’t afford it most.
Also, overpopulation isn’t being caused on this side of the globe, so complaining about it here isn’t going to solve anything. Canada’s population growth rate is only 1% / year, 70% of which is immigration.
My goodness, instead of praying for alternative sources of energy to come sooner, this numb nuts are praying for the gas to drop!!! way to go. I can see you totally don’t care about the environment or how gas will ruin as all if we don’t act now.
#9 – Thinker,
Sorry Thinker, I thought I was pretty clear about being an atheist from my point #1 in post #4. I was merely pointing out that for those induhviduals who believe, at least they could pray for something more worthwhile.
As for me, I just finished preying for my dinner.
#13 – Eternal Optimist,
You can’t seriously believe that drilling is the answer, right? Perhaps if you want the price to come down $0.03 or so. More likely, ExxonMobil or worse, some dictatorship or theocracy, will just steal another few cents profit per gallon.
And, we’ll still run out of oil with no solution to the problem and a planet in the midst of a Permian/Triassic level extinction event.
#14 – CO2Sasquatch,
All problems are minor and trivial compared to the cost of fuel. All problems are solved by more energy.
Funny. I thought all of our current problems were caused by more energy.
Energy=>food=>too many humans=>need for more energy=>no more arable land=>no more food=>catastrophe.
All without even mentioning the obvious that fossil fuel=>economy built on limited resources=>collapse when resources run out.
And, fossil fuel=>Global warming=>mass extinction=>large warm blooded animals dying off preferentially.
Humans are large warm blooded animals. We’re toast.
#22 – JimR,
#4Misanthropic Scott said, “2) High gasoline prices are the only thing that is going to make “we the idiots” do what we need to do in order to survive. “
You are so wrong there Scott. It’s not just the high gasoline prices that hurts, it’s the speed at which it rose which is causing inflationary pressure on basic necessities, which in turn is causing hardship for those who can’t afford it most.
All because slowly rising prices didn’t curb demand for StupidUglyVehicles. I realize it’s a huge hardship. However, it’s a hardship of all of our doing. Nothing else worked to stop our stupidity. So, now we pay the price. I know it hurts.
Also, overpopulation isn’t being caused on this side of the globe, so complaining about it here isn’t going to solve anything. Canada’s population growth rate is only 1% / year, 70% of which is immigration.
In a global economy, it does not matter where on the globe the overpopulation is. Sorry.
Malthus was wrong on two points.
1) Malthus dramatically overestimated the number of people the planet could sustainably support.
2) Malthus dramatically underestimated the degree to which we would steal from our children to feed ourselves.
This is the obvious answer that everyone has been missing. I hate when I don’t see these things first. I guess that we are going to have to get a big vigil together, because there are a whole bunch of prayers to Allah going the other way.
Actual answer: Increase margin requirements for accounts trading in energy and food commodities. What does every financial meltdown since the great depression have in common? Drum roll …. Leverage!
#12 – Mister Ketchup – “where the fuck did I say I’d help with the gas prices?”
He doesn’t come with full service? What kind of fake Messiah is he?!
#18 – ArianeB. – GOD HAS GIVEN YOU LEGS!!
Just fill up and you’re ready to go.
#23 – Tom – My goodness, instead of praying for alternative sources of energy to come sooner, this numb nuts are praying for the gas to drop!!!
They hope the rapture will come before the oil runs out…
#24… no, I don’t think drilling is the answer. The answer is to use our nation’s cheap resources (oil, coal, natural gas) while we can, to power us through a period of industrial development that will provide us with improved sustainable technology in the future.
The answer is NOT removing incentive in investment by heavy taxation, that will only worsen the problem. The answer is NOT in immediate cessation of coal and oil use and a switch over to wind and solar power. The answer is NOT to leave our cheap energy resources buried in the ground, where they do us no good.
If republicans are the religious ones in government, and republicans have their assets in oil, then wouldn’t that make god a republican, and wouldn’t he just tell these people to fuck off so he can go back to counting his money?
#26 – EO,
Depends on whether you consider preservation of a habitable biosphere to be no good.
Misanthropic Scott said, In a global economy, it does not matter where on the globe the overpopulation is. Sorry.
Well, actually it does matter. Their overpopulation is helping our economy and quality of life by providing inexpensive luxuries. We just get too piggish about it.
So, you are preaching to the wrong crowd. We are barely maintaining the population we have in NA. The other side?… there is nothing we can do about their lack of vision and their moronic superstitions. They’ll populate themselves into starvation before we do.