It is towards the end of my first 24 hours as a vegan, at the point when I discover I have already failed, that I begin to despair. How was I supposed to know there would be dairy products in a bag of nuts? Who the hell decided that putting dried milk powder in with the lemon and coriander flavoured cashews and macadamias was a good idea? Sainsbury’s, as it happens. Or bloody, sodding Sainsbury’s as I now like to call them…
There was also a bottle of maple syrup, ‘which you can use as a replacement for honey’. Until that moment it hadn’t occurred to me that honey was forbidden in the vegan diet. After all, honey doesn’t come pouring out of the tiddly bee’s honey duct, does it? It is manufactured outside their delightful stripy bodies. But it belongs to the bee so it can’t be used. After all we like the bee. We do not steal from the bee. I make a note to use maple syrup from now on. Like a quarter of a million other Britons, like Oprah Winfrey recently, I am going to be a vegan. I feel fellowship with the bee.
The early bits of a long, funny, insightful essay.
No, I don’t think I’m spoiling anything by telling you he doesn’t make the full week.
Vegan is just another word for douchebag.
#1–gquaglia==why is that? I assume you eat meat. Its only cheaper because vegans reduce the demand. You might be thinking (sic!) of PETA protesters? And even some of them eat meat as long as you don’t torture the animals first.
You are an idiot.
There is a standard woody allen quote that those that cannot do teach , and those that cannot teach teach gym
In this case it can be said that those that cannot cook , serve or cater become food critics of restaurants , bars , cafes caterers and the like
I’m sure #1 was referring to militant veganists. Like any fringe group, they have a twisted view of reality. And #2, thinking that there are enough vegans to affect the price of beef also demonstrates a skewed, slightly self-important perspective.
Vegitarianism is good for the body, but veganism is most certainly not. Most of the vegans I know are pale, small and weak, and it is largely because without eggs or milk there is no complete protein source that they can eat!
People who hurt themselves with this diet are one thing, but now some of them are killing their pets and children on it too.
This has always been said of any professional critic in any field..and strangely enough..always by people in that field. Isn’t that amazing.
Still, we all read at least some of them, and usually the harsher and funnier the better. That makes it easier for us to agree with them about how stupid most people are.
I suppose that’s why we get so upset when they suddenly attack something we think is good…and we get a glimpse of how stupid most people think we are also…^_^
#4–Rod==well, we both are agreeing gq’s statement is wrong and are guessing at what his detailed and insightful summary means.
We also agree that vegans remove themselves from the meat market. Under supply and demand theory, they are a negative impact on the price of meat. Why quibble about how much?
Yes, I am self important. The mark of a healthy ego. Same as everyone else posting here including yourself.
Now, I assume you think I am a vegan? Why would you think that?
#5 – “vegitarianism is good for the body”
Hmmm. Since we are omnivores by evolution then eating only meat would be good for the body.
I think I’ll stick with reality (and science) & continue my omnivorous diet.
Alternate sources of protein for vegans:
1. Tofu
2. Lentils
3. Peanuts
4. Pork chops
5. Beans
6. Soylent green
If a person is vegan because of a doctor’s order I see nothing wrong.
But if a person is a vegan solely because they want to reduce animal suffering, then they need to start growing their own food in a garden at the home.
The amount of animals that suffer and die in the process of large scale argriculture is staggering. Rodents and snakes alone are crushed and chopped up in harvesting. Poisons and other eradication methods to control rodents in the growing process and storage is also huge.
There is just as much blood from a turnip as there is from a cow.
So again, unless you grow your own, there will be suffering on either side of the field.
Cursor_
#2 Bobbo
Vegans ARE douchebags; next to Evangelical Christians and Mac Users, they think that their way of life the THE only way to live and will do anything possible make sure you convert to their P.O.V. or Else. Even if it means ruining the lives of others.
>>If a person is vegan because of a
>>doctor’s order I see nothing wrong.
I never met a vegan who adopted the lifestyle on a doctor’s orders, nor a doctor who would prescribe such a thing.
#12 – “I never met a vegan who adopted the lifestyle on a doctor’s orders, nor a doctor who would prescribe such a thing.”
I don’t think you ever will either:
“I will prescribe regimens for the good of my patients according to my ability and my judgment and never do harm to anyone.
To please no one will I prescribe a deadly drug nor give advice which may cause his death.”
Does veganism take into account the water buffalo working in the rice paddy? If so would rice require a “Produced with diesel power” certification.
If the water buffalo is set free and the job taken over by humans, would that be acceptable?
Even if you grow your own food per #10, is it ok to prevent the rabbit from eating your carrots?
Which is why I stand by my douchebag statement.
#11–Angel==really? I know the vegans of the type that just try to emphasize vegetables and use meat as a garnish.
Its sad that vegans get treated like Christians. Most of them are really good people, —really.
#16, “I know the vegans of the type that just try to emphasize vegetables and use meat as a garnish.”
If they are using animal products, they are not Vegans. That is the primary distinction. Most Vegans who call themselves by that name also go so far as to not wear clothing produced from animals (so of course they use synthetics meant to look as though they were).
#16 “Its sad that vegans get treated like Christians. Most of them are really good people, —really.”
Good, but incredibly stupid. Having stupid people around can be dangerous.
>>If they are using animal products, they
>>are not Vegans.
Bobbo is just trolling again. Ignore him.
Vegans are annoying people.
Eating more vegetables and less meat is probably healthy, but following a vegan diet it’s not natural.
We have incisors, canines and molars … not incisors only.
I used to be an ovo-lacto vegetarian, meaning I ate milk and eggs, but no “meat” meat. I soon found myself scorned by radical vegans, who for some reason viewed me with the same disdain as a full-fledged carnivore. Then I realized that yes, most vegans are nuts (without added lactose).
Nowadays, I’m not a vegetarian, yet after years of avoiding meat, I still find myself eating a 90% vegetarian diet. I think this is the best way. I get the health benefits of vegetarianism, without the lectures for vegans and carnivores.
That, and I treat myself to a nice juicy hamburger every month or so. It tastes so much better after several weeks of rice and beans.
I don’t get it. If a vegan eats just a little itsy bitsy teeny weeny bit of meat, they aren’t a vegan?
But a Christian can go out whoring, drinking, stealing, cheating, and lying, or even run for political office–and they are still a Christian?
very confusing.
Also, that report looks like Severus Snape.
Plants. It’s what food eats.
Why is it wrong to steal honey from bees, but okay to steal sap from maple trees? The ratiocination escapes me.
Yeast is alive.
Vegans KILL inocent living beings.
What about that?