St. Petersburg Times via TampaBay.com

TREASURE ISLAND — Debbie Shoemaker was wading in waist-deep water in the Gulf of Mexico when she felt something like “a big hard punch in my face.”

A pelican had just flown into her, its beak piercing her cheek. Shoemaker was taken to the emergency room, where a plastic surgeon gave her 26 stitches inside and outside her mouth.
[…]
Floridians know to watch for stingrays and to be wary of sharks, alligators and snakes. But pelicans are usually considered harmless.

“I do not recall an incident with a pelican,” said St. Pete Beach fire Chief Fred Golliner, whose agency responded to the accident Thursday afternoon.

Unfortunately, they don’t make glasses for nearsighted pelicans. Or… maybe there’s a killer pelican on the loose? Run for your lives, tourists. Har!

UPDATE: The pelican died from the collision.

Thanks MJ.




  1. julieb says:

    I wonder what pelicans taste like? Do people eat them?

  2. hhopper says:

    Not that I know of. I don’t think people eat any sea birds.

  3. RBG says:

    Still, nothing is going to top Fabio getting hit by a goose while on a roller coaster. What a goose was doing riding a roller coaster I’ll never know. But-a-bunk (Sorry, what’s the correct onomatopoeic expression? Ta-dunk? Kla-biddle-funk? Where’s Don Martin when you need him?)

    RBG

  4. hhopper says:

    Here ya go RBG:

  5. thomas says:

    In Soviet Russia tourist spear pelican

  6. anonymous says:

    Eh, fluke accident, I say.

  7. Thomas says:

    Once in Yosemite, a Blue Jay took a peanut from my mouth as I was about to eat. It stung like a bitch but I was lucky that he did not piece my lips or mouth. Maybe the bird species of the world are getting smarter and staging a take over? ;->

  8. Thomas says:

    “he did not pierce my lips or mouth.”

    mmm…autocorrect. infalliable as always…

  9. Thomas says:

    “infallible”

    apparently, autocorrect also has a sense of humor…

    [Thomas, you’re just a grammar comedian. – ed.]

  10. WmDE says:

    #2

    “Albatross. Albatross.”

  11. Ron Larson says:

    And when the woman demanded reimbursement for her medical expenses, the pelican replied “Just put it on my bill.”

    I kill me.

    No. Seriously. The Pelican was probably on his cell phone and wasn’t paying attention to where he was flying.

  12. Cinaedh says:

    “Pelican Spears Tourist”

    It has a nice ring to it. It’s not quite as evocative as “Hippo Eats Dwarf” but it’s damned close.

  13. Joshua says:

    This is a pun free comment. 🙂

    I’m surprised the woman isn’t being charged with something since the bird died and it’s Florida.

    I don’t think anyone eats sea birds either. Maybe if they are starving. Killing an Albatross is bad luck.

  14. Miguel Correia says:

    This pelican, a member of the true flying professionals, birds, didn’t learn one of the basic skills glider pilots learn, see and avoid…

  15. RBG says:

    OT: This can’t possibly work, but I’m going to irritate everyone until someone tells me how to embed a rim shot. ‘Course, you could be sorry:

    Birds are grouchy in the morning because their bills are over dew.

    RBG

  16. RBG says:

    OT: I tried copying the source code into my message above. Nope.

    Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, “I’m sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger.”

    RBG

  17. hhopper says:

    Readers are limited to a small amount of HTML… like <b>, <u>, <i>, <strike> and embedded links. Also <blockquote>.


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