  Plain, white baseballs are next to go |
The first part of the headline above is a quote from the great English mangler, Yankee great Yogi Berra. I wonder what he would say about this.
Don’t drink the water! – New York Yankees baseball
Two signs on the doors leading from the visitors’ clubhouse at U.S. Cellular Field to the first-base dugout read, “NO BOTTLED WATER ON THE BENCH.”
What’s this? Athletes can’t drink water? Even in the humid Chicago summers?
Here’s the explanation I got:
Gatorade is Major League Baseball’s “official sports drink.” So instructions were sent that no player could be seen drinking anything but Gatorade in the dugout. Not even Aquafina, which is the “official water” of MLB. Not even bottles of water with the labels removed.
White Sox clubhouse personnel said if players take bottled water onto the bench, all the bottled water will be removed from the clubhouse as punishment.
So remember, the biggest threat to baseball isn’t steroids or HGH or amphetamines or runaway ticket prices or four-hour games.
Hey ! Baseball is a MONEY-MAKING BUSINESS, so any way to MAKE EVEN MORE MONEY, like selling the rights to what the players can drink, must be ok !!! I imagine next players uniforms will start to sprout as many LOGOS as race cars !!! THERE IS NO END TO ADVERTISING !!! And wait, your cellphone will go off to remind you to look at a billboard you are passing !!!
This is only true at Cominsky?
That’s an incredibly stupid rule, but if I were getting paid millions of dollars to play ball all day, I think I could put up with it.
If I were a player I would quit if I had to drink crap (not water). Anitfreeze, er um, Gatorade is shit and should be banned. That shit will give you some unknown disease and organ failure in a few years.
Gatorade is OK, it you cut it with an equal amount of water. Otherwise it’s too concentrated.
The “nothing but Gatorade” rule is just stupid.
1. Acquire Gatorade bottle.
2. Empty bottle.
3. Pour in water.
4. Problem solved.
5. Duh.
“FailureAid, The Official Drink of the Pittsburgh Pirates”. This explains a lot. Apparently the Buccos have only been able to drink FailureAid and eat Mrs. T’s Peirogies for the last 15 years. Here’s to our 16th straight losing season!
Brawndo: The thirst Mutilator! It’s got electrolytes!
They’re working out the bugs for something similar for player’s chewing gum and personal insurance plans.
RBG
#8 –> 🙂 That was exactly what I was thinking.
This doesn’t surprise me! Remember when they try to put ‘Spiderman 2’ on the bases?
http://nbcsports.msnbc.com/id/4918975/
As a cyclist there is no way I could function if all I could drink was Gatorade, and I’ve tried. The stuff is simply too sugary and causes your mouth to feel sticky and disgusting, nor does it succesfully quench your thirst. Cutting it with water helps, but then it just tastes like crap. Better to save it for after a ride.