A European company called Renova is marketing luxury toilet paper in four stylish colors. Give a roll (or the thoughtful Gift Set of three rolls) to a friend as a holiday present. His or her ass will thank you. What’s that you say? Your friends’ posteriors are already stylishly satisfied, but what about their kitchens? As if you had to ask. Of course they make hot paper towels!
Web makes it easy to find funky gift
Imagine waking up on Christmas morning and finding an elk carcass under the tree.If you’re interested in making this come true for one of your loved ones, I know where you can buy one on the Internet. If not, there are plenty of other unique gifts available on the Web.
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The elk carcass [from Amazon.com, of all places,] weighs approximately 225 pounds, is inspected by the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) and can be butchered to your specifications and shipped to your home in seven to 14 days. It’ll set you back $1,225 but just imagine the look on your beloved grandmother’s face. It’s totally worth it.
Not unique or odd enough? At the high end, there’s always the Neiman Marcus catalog (eg, Montana Wilderness Package — $2.3 mil) and Archie McPhee on the, um, less sophisticated and less pricey side of your wallet (eg, The Electronic Yodeling Pickle — $12.95) .
What weird gifts are you planning on giving, hope to receive or wish you could give or receive? What’s the oddest thing anyone has every given you?
When Russia opened up to the west, I used the public toilet in Gorky Park. At the exchange rate then, it was cheaper to use their paper currency directly rather than pay more to buy toilet paper. Money was softer too.
Felt a bit guilty doing that, but it was a valuable lesson in international finance and I hope did not foretell the fate of the GOUSA greenback. I think its called “intrinsic value” or some such.
Hillary nutcrackers for all!
How about brown?
Then you can use it over again
Memo to JCD.
Stay away from Mistletoe anywhere near #2