“I’ll feed the kid later. I want my present NOW!”

Another reason for those in other countries to think of us as spoiled, pampered wooses. I wonder how many woman in Islamic countries expect presents?

A Bundle of Joy Isn’t Enough?
When Jena Slosberg of Bedford, N.H., gave birth in March, she endured a labor that lasted 17 hours. But her discomfort was ultimately worth it, quite apart from the arrival of her daughter, Marin. In the recovery room, her husband, Paul, presented her with a pair of diamond earrings.

“I was on cloud nine,” Ms. Slosberg said. “It was the perfect present to make a frazzled, sleep-deprived, first-time mommy feel absolutely glamorous.”

She added, “I wonder what 17 hours of labor will get me next time?”

In a more innocent age, new mothers generally considered their babies to be the greatest gift imaginable. Today, they are likely to want some sort of tangible bonus as well.

This bonus goes by various names. Some call it the “baby mama gift.” Others refer to it as the “baby bauble.” But it’s most popularly known as the “push present.”

Remember how Valentines day was created by card makers to make more money? You don’t think jewelers are behind this gem of a money goldmine, do you?



  1. QB says:

    Wow, most men just agree to the vasectomy at that point.

  2. Personality says:

    RUN TO MEXICO!

  3. bobbo says:

    I just googled “push present” and got 5400 hits.

    But keep talking about it and I’m sure the number will go up.

    Some nice reviews from google. My favorite: “Show her you’d impregnate her all over again!”

  4. bobbo says:

    PS—“my left testicle” has 47,000 listings.

  5. Improbus says:

    What is next? Presents for a hard bowel movement? Jeez.

  6. Robert D. says:

    It’s just the major retailers trying to think up reasons for us to buy gifts for people for any conceivable reason. Don’t give ham-brained scams like this a second thought.

    PS: If your wife is so interested in getting diamond for giving birth, then maybe you shouldn’t have married someone quite so shallow.

  7. dm says:

    Do flowers count?

  8. the answer says:

    Isn’t that what baby showers are for?

    Good Call #7 DM

  9. Richard says:

    Just another reason not to have children.

  10. Gay says:

    Just another reason to stay away from bitches

  11. eyeofthetiger says:

    Plastic surgery for some stretch marks. Now that’s love.

  12. Greg Allen says:

    Man, am I a whimp! I gave my wife a gift during the birth of our child and it was a C-section. No pushing involved!

    I had no idea anybody else did it. It was her idea to get some sort of jewelry to commemorate the event and I thought it was a nice idea.

  13. PoliticallyVeryCorrect says:

    #12
    “pussywhipped” is a more apropiate description…

  14. Perry Noiya says:

    A REAL man is sitting in a bar when his cellphone rings. A woman on the other end of the call says “Hey! I’ve got great news. I’ve just had your baby and it’s a boy! I’ve named him after you.”

    Man replies “That is good news. I hope you both are doing well. Uhh.. Your voice is familiar but I can’t quite remember your name.”

  15. jlm says:

    seems kinda shallow for both the husband and wife…”thanks for the kid, heres a necklace”

    “kid looks kinda goofy, heres a gold bracelet…do better next time and you might get diamonds”

  16. PoliticallyVeryCorrect says:

    #15 its very in line with i.e. rich people forced to pay exorbitant spousal support to ex-wife for… what exactly? Obviously SEX and only SEX received during their marriage (poor man’s ex-wife can always claim cooking, housecleaning and other usual chores…)

  17. GeTlosT says:

    what a bullshit
    perhaps she spent 17hrs having the baby, but he will spend next 20 years supporting it!
    She should have bought him a gift, not the other way around, after all its mostly the women who want child, men just want sex *without* surprise 9 mths later every time they do her, geez!

  18. Eric says:

    Why do I get a vision of Gee Dub in the aftermath of the Terrorist attacks against the World Trade Center telling people to get out there and shop when I read this story?

    Rampant consumerism at it’s finest.

    Whatever happened to appreciating the gifts God gave you?

    Is it any wonder this society is living with massive amounts of debt when at every conceivable moment we’re told that the only way to celebrate is to spend money?

  19. Ascii King says:

    I think you mean “wusses”.

  20. Jamie says:

    I have no problem with a guy giving his wife a gift after going through labor. She went through labor, and he wanted to show appreciation. I don’t have a problem with people giving each other gifts.

    I do however, have issue with the EXPECTATION of gifts that people seem to get hung up on, and the creation of “holidays” to support that. People spazzing over not getting exactly what they want for valentines/sweetest day, and not thinking about how well they might be treated the rest of the year.

    The diamond industry capitalizes on that with commercials that say “if you love her, give her a piece of sparkly carbon that was mined using what’s equates to slave labor!” Woo.

    Guess I need more splenda in my tea, I’m getting bitter.

  21. Ron Larson says:

    Well… we now graduation ceremonies for kindergarten and the 6th grade. Seriously. Cap, gown, and diplomas. Can you friggn’ believe it?

    Mediocrity is now celebrated.


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