Cash bail of $2,100 was set today for Warren G. Whitelightning of Crandon, the man who allegedly led police on a high-speed chase through Madison’s west after stealing a Krispy Kreme Donut truck when he was drunk early Saturday morning. Whitelightning was officially charged in Dane County Circuit Court today in a criminal complaint alleging several offenses. He is being charged with shoplifting eight giant red hot pickled sausages from the Open Pantry on University Avenue, stealing the doughnut truck, ramming a University of Wisconsin Police car, attempting to elude pursuing officers, operating after revocation, his fourth time drunk driving, and a hit and run. Assistant District Attorney Michael Verveer conceded that the scene described in the criminal complaint of several squad cars chasing a donut truck around the west side could elicit laughter from many. “Because what you have is two different police agencies chasing the defendant in a stolen Krispy Kreme donut truck with donuts flying out of the back of the truck,” he said.
I wonder if that slowed them down?
Verveer said the chase was captured on tape by video cameras in the pursing squad cars and predicted the tapes would hit the popular YouTube web site when they are released to the public.
No doubt. Lets see, a guy named Whitelightning, steals hot pickled sausages and a Krispy Kreme truck, with officers in hot pursuit, and doughnuts flying out the back. Coming to a theatre near you.
Thanks to Mister Justin
Hmmmm, donuts.
Finally a story from my home state that doesn’t involve cheese.
Just sausages and drinking…
Tags for this story:
giant
red
hot
pickled
sausages
For such a tiny dust-speck of a town (population 2,000), Crandon has been getting quite a bit of press lately. First a massacre and now a caper.
#3
You forgot:
“Real-Life Ronnie Dobbs”
# 2 wbskeet37 said, in December 3rd, 2007 at 9:22 am
Finally a story from my home state that doesn’t involve cheese.
Or highschool murders, child abuse/murder, white trash mothers showing off her dildos to her children, serial killers, drunk college students drowning in the river, etc etc… boy our state is f$%ked.
#6 sadtruth…
I believe we would find “highschool murders, child abuse/murder, serial killers, and drunk college students drowning in the river” in any state.
And the whole “white trash mothers showing off her dildos to her children” we should be able to find in Florida.
The home of the greatest football (American style) team ever and you two quibble over the American way ??
Shush !
How can anyone not consider this to be the greatest example of what it takes to actually motivate law-enforcement ? Canadian imported Krispy Kreme must be stopped !!
OK, let me get this straight: my speeding ticket for 63 in a 50 near Milwaukee cost me $250. And this guy did all of this and got to leave the police station for $210?!?!?!?
@ #7
Suppose so.
Seems like Wis shows up a lot on Dvorak’s blog though. They must have a google alert set to Wis or something.
I think Wis deserves one of the Dvorak banners… “More effed up news from Wis” or some such.
#10. If we did one for you, we’d have to do one for everybody, except Colorado, of course.
#11 – But not one for Ohio, no wait, I meant we wanted a bigger type font than the rest.
God, this story made our night when it happened.
(For the record: I direct the news at one of the local Madison TV stations)
They seem to have a special kind of challenged crime mindset up in that part of the US. I’m beginning to understand why the idea for Mystery Science Theater 3000, came from there, and nowhere else. It couldn’t have come from anywhere else!
#10: I think UncleDave is originally from Wisconsin.
ROFL!!! omfg this is gonna be a good video lols
I hate to be the one to point out the obvious, but I’m pretty sure the name Whitelightning would be an American Indian surname. So try not to make fun of it too much, Uncle Dave.
What? How did I get involved in this?
watch…he’ll get off on the hot pickled sausage and sugar defense….
LOL, I found this page form a google search for donuts, looking for recipes for different stuff for my donut maker. Nothing here it seems!