– In case you want to set your DVR.

President George W. Bush will hold a news conference at 10:10 a.m. EST on Tuesday, the White House said.

The president will lie about the war in Iraq, he’ll try to snow people with Israeli lies about peace in Palestine, he’ll continue to lie about diplomatic relations with Iran, he’ll make-up dreams about the state of the U.S. economy and, finally, he’ll lie about his plans to veto any useful legislation to come from Congress – presuming the Democrats sprouted a backbone over the weekend.

The reporters allowed to attend will not ask any dangerous questions.



  1. TheGlobalWarmer says:

    Whatever Bush has done wrong, he’s been approximately 42.3 times better than Kerry would have been and Earth as a livable place wouldn’t even exist any more if Algore had succeeded in stealing the election in 2000. Not to mention that Bush, for all his faults, is still far better than any of the Democratic crap that’s running right now.

  2. Mister Mustard says:

    >>Whatever Bush has done wrong, he’s been
    >>approximately 42.3 times better than Kerry

    Highly unlikely. Kerry would have been more like Clinton, and Clinton rocked (no matter how many felonious blow-jobs he got from his curvacious courtesan). Compared to Dumbya, Kerry is King of the World and Master of the Universe, and Al Gore is the Messiah.

    It still renders me dazed and confused when I run into somebody who’s actually willing to portray Dumbya as anything other than the lying, ignorant, dishonest, grandiose, illiterate dipshit that he is.

    There are so few of you around any longer.

  3. TheGlobalWarmer says:

    Sorry, I doublechecked the figures, 42.3 time better +/- .4 times.

    I didn’t say he’s been a great President, just that he’s been incredibly better than the alternatives. Bill was no great shakes either.

  4. MikeN says:

    Mr Nostradamus Eidard,
    could you explain what you mean by ‘lie about plans to veto’?
    Is he going to say he’ll sign when he plans to veto it, or is he going to say he plans to veto something, when he really plans to sign? Or his he planning to use a pocket veto?

  5. MikeN says:

    Just keep repeating to your self, there is no victory in Iraq, there is no victory in Iraq.

  6. Improbus says:

    troll’n, troll’n, troll’n

    [sung to the theme of Rawhide]

  7. ECA says:

    ANd with a 10 second DELAY, thay can EDIT anything out..

  8. Mister Mustard says:

    >>I didn’t say he’s been a great President,
    >>just that he’s been incredibly better than
    >>the alternatives.

    Actually, HotHouse Man, he’s leading the pack by a long shot as The Worst President To Ever Stain the Oval Office.

    Other’s may have been more incompetent, and others may have been more evil, but with Dumbya it’s one-stop shopping for the absolute worst “leader” [koff, koff] the country has ever had.

  9. TheGlobalWarmer says:

    #37 – The Rawhide part only needed to be pointed out the kiddies. 😉

    Trollin’, Trollin’, Trollin’,
    Keep them insults rollin’,
    Trollin’, Trollin’, Trollin’… tonight…

  10. OhForTheLoveOf says:

    #20 – I still don’t believe he’s leaving in ‘08. He’s going to find some ‘emergency,’ or another false flag operation, like 9/11, declare martial law, and postpone the elections indefinitely, while he remains king.

    That would be so cool. I’d love that.

    One: It would be about the most interesting and dramatic attempted coup ever, and the ensuing chaos would be amazing to watch.

    Two: It might be a catalyst for real change at the core… after the Bush insurrection is quickly put down.

    Three: If we really pulls it off, maybe the European Union would have to invade the US to liberate us.

    That would be cool… but alas, it just ain’t gonna happen. Ever. Bush isn’t a Bond villian. He’s just an incompetent bureaucrat.

  11. TheGlobalWarmer says:

    Sorry Deli Sandwich Condiment, but that title goes to Carter, by a mile.

  12. TheGlobalWarmer says:

    #41 – Any of your scenarios would be preferable to the would-be Empress Hillarius.

    Hell, If Russia dropped megatonners on all our major cities to liberate us we’d be better off than Hillary.

  13. Mister Mustard says:

    >>Sorry Deli Sandwich Condiment, but that
    >>title goes to Carter, by a mile.

    Not even close. Carter may not have done so great with inflation and the economy (largely due to them damned A-rabs), but he was honest, hardworking, and someone you could trust.

    Dumbya, on the other hand, combines the intelligence of Reagan with the honesty of Nixon and the charisma of Ford. Anyway you look at his reign, it’s an abortion.

  14. TheGlobalWarmer says:

    Trust Carter?!? The man is delusional. He thinks it was his negotiations that got the Tehran hostages loose. Funny how those negotiations didn’t actually do anything until after Carter lost the election and someone with a spine was elected. Not to mention 55mph, 68′ thermostats and wear sweaters to stay warm. Carter was probably the most anti-American President we’ve ever had.

  15. Mister Mustard says:

    >>The man is delusional.

    And Dumbya’s not?? The difference is that Dumbya is also sleazy, unethical, immoral, not against illegal actions and shredding our “goddamned piece of paper”, inhcoherent, illiterate, and stupid as a fucking rock.

    Jimmy Carter may not have been the best president the country ever had, but he’s certainly not the worst. Not even in recent memory.

    In 413 day’s they’re going to retire the “Worst President Ever” jersey. NOBODY could ever come close to our current knuckle-dragging chimpanzee.

  16. gregallen says:

    Remember how Bush ran in 2000 on the claim that it was GORE who supposedly had the lying problem!

    One sure way to tell what the conservatives are up to — just listen to what that accuse liberals of.

  17. MikeN says:

    Trust Carter to do the wrong thing.

  18. MikeN says:

    But that’s OK, he got a Nobel prize for bashing the President.

  19. Mister Mustard says:

    >>Trust Carter to do the wrong thing.

    Rubber. Glue. Pffft.

    Bush doesn’t know what the wrong thing is, but he tries like heck to do it. It’s like having a lobotomized monkey in office. At least Nixon was smart and evil. Dumbya’s just evil. And stupid beyond belief.

    And can’t they teach that guy to talk like a person of normal intelligence? I’ve worked at small companies that provided media training for people who had to interact with TV or radio interviewers. Is he really THAT wooden-headed that they can’t teach him public speaking at the level of a middle-schooler?

  20. Mister Mustard says:

    >>Remember how Bush ran in 2000 on the claim
    >>that it was GORE who supposedly had the
    >>lying problem!

    Bush: Iraqui oil will pay for the cost of the war in its entirety.

    Truth: The Joint Economic Committee of the House and Senate estimates that, unless drastic changes are implemented, the Iraq war will cost $3,500,000,000,000.00 (that’s right – three point five TRILLION dollars).

    We can’t provide medical care for our citizens, we can’t produce decent public schools, we can’t rebuild New Orleans, we can’t do anything that a government should be doing, because the Chimperor in Chief lied about the cost (as well as everything else) of the war, and threw the futures of generation after generation down the pissoir of his trophy war.

    Mission Accomplished, O Great One.

  21. Mr. Fusion says:

    MikeN & iHotAir(YOP),

    You are both idiots to suggest Carter was so bad. There are easily a dozen Presidents that were worse. Start with Buchanan. Don’t forget Andrew Johnson, Grant, Hayes, or Arthur. Pierce isn’t known for accomplishing much. Then there was Taft, Hoover, and Ford. Reagan is vastly over rated by conservatives. Bush I could have been a great man but associated with too many jerks and neo-cons.

    Yup. Each of them make Carter look good. Some make Carter look great. But of all the less than steller Presidents, Bush II will be known as THE worse.

    Buchanan is noted for letting the country rip itself apart during his term. GW Bush will be remembered for tearing the country apart by himself.

  22. Mister Mustard says:

    Good points, Mister Fusion. I can see that your core reactor has reached critical mass, and the energy is flowing.

  23. Marc says:

    What’s up with all the goddamn bush-lovers on here? He’s a fucking war-criminal and so is cheney and rumsfeld.

  24. Mr. Fusion says:

    #54, Marc,

    You bring up a good point. But if Bush is “fucking a war criminal” then that means they may reproduce. Can you imagine a bunch of little Bushies running around claiming “It is just a god damn piece of paper, why are you upset I ripped it up?”

  25. MikeN says:

    Yet it was one of the editors of this blog that suggested recently the Constitution should be overruled by modern sensibilities, while talking about the DC gun ban.

  26. joel says:

    I try not to buy into extremist arguments from either side, and I’m certainly no Bush “fan”. I do, however, identify pretty strongly with conservative values.

    Let’s get something straight. Bush isn’t a conservative man in almost any sense of the word. He’s a business man, and we don’t need a business man in the white house. That also applies to anyone who has made politics their “business”, which pretty much rules out every candidate. Whether or not they’ll admit it, GW has disappointed the party he represents to a great degree, and the only ones left supporting him are blindly doing so because of a thoughtless party affiliation. Bush has proven himself strong evidential support that Conservative != GOP, at least not always.

    Conservative and Liberal are really more personal ideologies, whereas Republican and Democrat are the words that typically constrain people, very unfortunately, to mob-think.

    My personal politics are quite independent from either party, and I like to pick and choose what I feel fits best. Some of the bickering comments here are pretty absurd, and they need to be recognized as such – see comment #27. I would argue that BOTH parties tend to appeal to fear to garnish political power because it’s very effective; Bush and his group scare you with terrorism and dependence on foreign oil, while Hillary Clinton scares you with a lack of healthcare and government provided retirement, and Al Gore is ranting about the planet exploding and all the money it will take to save it. It’s all basically horseshit. We have nothing to fear – as a nation we are very powerful, independent, and civilized. But we really need to start electing better leaders. Don’t continue to give the same people (there’s really not much difference, did you realize that?) power by swallowing their two-party sham game without question.

    When did people decide that individual freedoms (which, I may remind you are inextricably bonded with individual *responsibility*) no longer mattered, and a huge government would be henceforth responsible for all of our needs and wellbeing? I distrust people like George Bush, Cheney, the Clintons, Al Gore, and really the whole lot of them. The answer is a smaller government, with fewer responsibilities, paired with a greater accountability for those responsibilities that are left. That’s my opinion on the matter.

    Finally, I’ll say one last thing. Fear is not always a bad thing for people to have. A man is not a divine being, and for some people a healthy dose of fear can keep him honest. But you should never fear your own government, it should fear you. The only thing a man should fear are the consequences of his own actions.

  27. Steve says:

    #57 Joel – Or maybe his own inactions.


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