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STLtoday – News – Missouri State News — Another example of the a-holes running around in city government.

Country Mart’s doughnuts — fried fresh daily in the store — sell for just 52 cents each. That is why the “shoplifters will be prosecuted” signs are displayed in aisle 4 with the pricey pain and allergy pills, and not in aisle 5 beside the glass doughnut case with its tiger tails, jelly-filleds and eclairs.

Then one man’s sweet tooth got the better of him. He stole a doughnut. A single doughnut.

Authorities called it strong-arm robbery. The “doughnut man,” as the suspect is now known, faces five to 15 years in prison for his crime.

found by Aric Mackey



  1. JimR says:

    Not all cases are the same therefor I suggest one of the following for at least a year, with an option of additional psychiatric counseling:

    1. Put him in boot camp
    2. Chain him to a urinal with a bucket and mop
    3. Community service helping the challenged
    4. Chain him to a chair, while Mr. mustard explains over and over why he is a different kind of christian.

  2. Frank IBC says:

    So, by your sarcastic tone, Mr. Effusion, are you suggesting that it somehow wasn’t his fault that he torched the car?

  3. Frank IBC says:

    And are you saying that there is no reason why people who can’t control their own actions shouldn’t be taken off the streets?

  4. Greg Allen says:

    You’d think this kind of nonsense would have bi-partisan opposition; conservatives should be against it because it’s a stupid waste of our tax dollars; liberals are against this because we have common sense.

  5. Joshua says:

    #34….Greg Allen….You have a point about the cost. While conservatives are usually more fiscally conscious, they are also strong believers(real conservatives here, not those religious imposters) in responsability for ones actions.
    So, a conservative could go either way on this one. 🙂

  6. BubbaRay says:

    #4, Ed., darnit. My best chance and I still don’t receive the UKKMA. For that alone, you’re dangerously close to receiving the BRDDA. Although rewarding each other would just be ridiculous. 😆

    If that donut divin’ dude had just followed the basic FSM tenets, he’d have paid for the donut and stayed out of trouble…

  7. Mr. Fusion says:

    #32, Frank,

    I don’t know why he torched his car. It was apparently to collect the insurance money. That instance and the other listed crimes suggest that the guy is a low level low life. Most likely addicted to drugs, booze, or both. Again, I don’t know.

    It does cost a lot less to rehabilitate the guy and make him a contributing member of society then it does to incarcerate him for a few years.

  8. Guyver says:

    24. Point is, Liberal-Minded people usually try to use a telescope rather than a mirror when finding fault. They rationalize to a point where someone is not responsible for their own actions. They rationalize to the point where the crimnal is somehow the victim. What’s even more funnier is when Liberal-Minded people take the rare moment to try and become fiscially conservative when they rationalize something.

    25. Agreed, but I prefer Libertarian.


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