1. Stev1e says:

    Doesn’t stop it being a dangerous work of fiction though

  2. Christians have been ridiculed and persecuted for a couple of thousand years now. Yes, many of today’s preachers are only in it for the money and power. And Jesus predicted they would increase in the last days. But they will have their true reward on Judgement Day.

    There are many hundreds of thousands of humble, compassionate, and loving Christians who have given up material things to serve the poor and needy. It is unfortunately these Christians who suffer the most when unbelievers cast hate and ridicule by assuming all Christians are hypocrites like the TV preachers and cult leaders who twist the scriptures for their own benefit.

    “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” Jesus Christ

  3. My Stone says:

    The iStone : it’s a paper weight, it skips on water, you can mash potatoes, even smash a iPhone, wins over scissors, endless uses…

  4. Scott says:

    Remember though that you have to take out a 2 year contract with the Christian Church and if you go pray anywhere else they push out an update which turns the iBible to stone.

  5. Mr. Fusion says:

    #2, Kristian,

    If you wish to follow the bible, that is your prerogative. If you wish to think that because some “Christians” help the needy and poor they deserve some sort of hero worship, then that is your prerogative. If you also wish to think you and the majority of “Christians” are not hypocrites, then that is also your prerogative.

    I am tired of hearing “Christians” claiming they are harassed, ridiculed, and persecuted. That is a straw man argument to deflect away from the harm “Christians” actually do.

    Please, don’t inflict your fairy tales upon me.

  6. NappyHeadedHo says:

    Too expensive. I would have bought it if it was $666.

  7. Mr. Fission says:

    #5, Mr. Fusion

    I can only imagine the bitterness, pain and fright you must harbor. May God truly have mercy on your wretched soul.

  8. Piotr says:

    @NappyHeadedHo

    The original Apple computer had $666,66 tag price [Woz ideia]

    Waiting for conspiration theories…

    Sorry if my english is wrong…

  9. TIHZ_HO says:

    #2 “…who is without sin cast the first stone.” Jesus the Christ

    (A large stone is immediately hurled from behind the crowd hitting the Magdalena)

    “Mom…you really piss me off when you do that!” – Jesus the Christ

    BTW, its Jesus THE Christ not Jesus Christ. “Christ” is from the Greek word “Christos” meaning king. Jesus was seen as the rightful heir to the Jewish crown – this caused friction with Rome’s puppet king Herod. Also “Messiah” meant “anointed one” which also meant King so King David was a Messiah and David the Christ as well as Solomon and so on.

    This is worth mentioning in my view as many so called Christians have no idea about Jesus save for all the “interpretations” and church dogma which is far off the track.

    Cheers

  10. Matt Garrett says:

    Only a bigot would make such a statement without acknowledging the good Christians do in the world as well, Mr. Fusion. You tend to forget that while Christians live by the forgiveness of God, they are just as human as you are.

    I pray that you will let go of your hate just long enough to ask yourself what good those who follow God do in the world.

    As for the video – my initial reaction was to say “well well, another antiChristian” commentary. But then, I realized that as a Christian, we’re sometimes like that. And besides, I couldn’t help laughing at the “lamp unto my feet, light onto my path” line.

  11. Sancti Mounious says:

    But wait… if you order now, we will include at no extra charge:
    – A copy of the ten commandments for you to display at your favorite government office.
    – A megaphone so you can play your iBible on the street corner really loud.
    – An index of verses (taken completely out of context) that you can use to justify any action, no matter how immoral or criminal.
    – A chastity belt for you daughter.
    – A brick with the word “Fag” that you can use to beat your queer neighbor.
    – An “I know I’m right because God told me so” T-Shirt.
    – A “honk if you hate Muslims” bumper sticker

    But you must call within the next ten minutes… don’t wait… Rapture might happen any time now and you don’t want to miss out on this deal!

  12. Axtell says:

    There should be freedom *from* religion as much as freedom *of* religion.

    Because I don’t believe in any religion, I should have any faith’s influence on government. That includes removing the ‘in god we trust’ from our money, from removing ‘under god’ from the pledge of allegiance, and not having any faith influencing funding for science.

    That includes removing all debate from abortion, it’s a science decision and not a religious one; removing all sanctions from stem cell research.

  13. Stu Mulne says:

    “Freedom FROM Religion”…. Exactly….

    But the thing’s funny….

    And you can find quite a few “Bible on CD” or “Bible on DVD” offerings if you watch a little late night TV….

    Nothing wrong with that….

    When the mud monster was being Bat Mitzvah, I helped her prepare. We only had one copy of the prayerbook, and the kid, being more than a little perverse, wouldn’t let me look at it while assisting her. I found a downloadable copy of the material I needed on the Internet, and stuck it on my PDA…. $10ish at the time. Worth it for the look on her face….

    Unless you’re really agin it, there’s no reason to not keep a copy of the Bible (in some form) around the house. Even if you’re not a “believer” (I’m considered a Heretic around here), there’s some interesting stuff in there, and once in a while you need to look something up.

    ‘Course, a dedicated Ipod may be a little much…. A DVD (or two?) and one of those cheap “pocket” portable players might be a good idea…. The kids need to see the candy version too – especially if the Sunday School folks are testing….

    Regards,

    Stu.

  14. Mister Mustard says:

    >>This is worth mentioning in my view as many so called Christians
    >>have no idea about Jesus save for all the “interpretations” and
    >>church dogma which is far off the track.

    We don’t need no intercessor,
    We don’t need no thought control,
    No dark sarcasm, while we worship,
    Preacher leave them kids alone.
    HEY! PREACHER! Leave them kids alone!

    Too many people paying lip service, following (or claiming they follow) the letter of the “law”, without following the spirit of the law. It’s a darned shame.

    Maybe those guys who come to the front door are right. The End Times ARE near.

    Woo. Think about it.

  15. Peter says:

    #9 – Robot Chicken had a very similar skit. Hilarious!

  16. Gary Marks says:

    What I find interesting and significant about many religious people is how seldom that reading their holy scripture actually changes their mind, and how often such reading merely confirms that they were “right” all along. Just an observation.

    I ordered the iBible with the optional USB port. You can connect it to your desktop or laptop computer and it will heal your corrupted data. Good deal.

  17. Awake says:

    Do you think they accept returns? I accidentally picked out he wrong one and received the one that only “Speaks in Tongues”. It’s creeping me out, specially because it starts up by itself whenever I look at porn.

    As an aside, isn’t it ironic how if you speak in Tongues and you call yourself a Christian, you are blessed, but if you speak in tongues and don’t attribute it to Christianity, then you are probably possessed by demons.

    To the Christians out there, I have a basic question, I have a basic question that is bugging me:
    I man was created in the image of God, and Adam was the first man, what color was Adam? Where do the different races come from? Are ‘the other’ races cast-outs or something? But a Nordic white guy next to an Ebony black guy next to a deep Asian, and they are very very different.

  18. Jägermeister says:

    #2 – Christians have been ridiculed and persecuted for a couple of thousand years now.

    😥 Cry, baby, cry!!!… 😥

    Christians love to feel oppressed, but you read some books except for your story book, you might have known that the Christians are the oppressors and that was pretty much from day one.

  19. Mister Mustard says:

    >>Christians love to feel oppressed

    No we don’t. But here on dvorzhak dot org slash blog, it just feels so right.

    >>But a Nordic white guy next to an Ebony black guy next to a
    >>deep Asian, and they are very very different.

    Only to you, son. Only to you. I’ll bet you think a red pepper is “very very different” from a yellow pepper or a green one. Or is it just a racial thing with you? And wtf is a “deep Asian”?

    >>if you speak in tongues and don’t attribute it to Christianity,
    >>then you are probably possessed by demons.

    Any way you look at it, if you speak in tongues, you’re probably posessed by demons. Neurochemical ones.

  20. Lauren the Ghoti says:

    Waiting for a fairytale-theme post to share a little something with da Hop, OFTLO, M Scott, Jäg, Fuso – and anyone else…

  21. Mister Mustard says:

    No, Troutmeister, you didn’t forget the syntax. But you forgot to use tinyurl for excessively long URLs.

    Too busy bashing Christians and servicing that “lady of a certain age”, perhaps?

    Tsk. You should take a course in multitasking at the local community college.

  22. Jägermeister says:

    #20 – Lauren

    Yeah, that’s the cat who created the kitty litter in six days and slept on the seventh.

  23. Lauren the Ghoti says:

    It’s not a URL, it was intended to be an image tag. Having used it successfully once, I promptly proceeded to forget it…

    I realize you had to try to make a crack – since that cartoon really stung, didn’t it? 🙂

  24. Lauren the Ghoti says:

    Actually, I think the story says, the Cat God created the heavens and the Earth on the first day, the can opener the second day, and on the 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th and 7th days, He had a nap.

  25. Mister Mustard says:

    >>I realize you had to try to make a crack – since
    >>that cartoon really stung, didn’t it?

    No, not at all. I’ve suffered much worse at the hands of the Christian Bashers. Hatemongers are a dime a dozen. And it certainly was nothing compared to you giving out your name on the internet.

    Fool.

  26. Mister Mustard says:

    >>It’s not a URL, it was intended to be an image tag.

    Competence rating?

  27. Lauren the Ghoti says:

    Snot my name. Is my Spanish nickname from whence ‘Lauren the Ghoti’ is derived. What have I told you, time and time again, about assumptions – foooool?

    …Not to mention what the big, all-powerful, all-knowing invisible human in the sky’s told you…

    Since one can’t preview one’s comments, nor edit them after posting, you’d should question the competence of the jokers behind WordPress, not me. 🙂

  28. Mr. Fusion says:

    #27,
    you … should question the competence of the jokers behind WordPress

    Whatever happened to “Personal Responsibility”?
    🙂

  29. Lauren the Ghoti says:

    “Whatever happened to “Personal Responsibility”?
    🙂 ”

    Good question. Very good question, in fact.

    Were there any other questions?

    • • •

    BTW, like the way Piraro exposes and skewers the true, mundane and pathetic reason why “God created Man in His own image”?

  30. Mister Mustard says:

    >>Is my Spanish nickname from whence
    >>‘Lauren the Ghoti’ is derived.

    Haw haw. I slap you with a dead trout, son.

    >>from whence

    Get back to your ESL class, eh?


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