10. Noisy doors.
You can’t walk three feet in a starship without some door whooshing or screeching at you. My office building has automatic sliding doors. They’re dead silent. If those doors went “wheet!” every time a person walked through them, about once a month some guy in accounting would snap and go on a shooting rampage. Sorry Scotty, the IEEE has revoked your membership until you learn to master WD-40
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In defense of true Trekdom (TOS), I must point out that most of that polarity reversal and frequency matching and imaginary particle crap came from the wussy Next Generation and especially Voyager.
It’s amazing that people take sci-fi series serious.
Several times in my life I have accidentally reversed the polarity on various electronics I was working on… A car stereo once… A hard drive, and few other things here and there. I can’t recall a single time it made things work better. Mostly I got sparks and then the device never worked again.
Cripes! Cross-circuiting to “B.”
#2, jag,
It is equally amazing how when a new technology comes along the number of people that scream “But Doo Doo first predicted that in Wee Wee, part of the The Begats series. Except his anterior perambulator wheels were in the same parallel directional rotation”.
Noisy doors…
Who has ever had a front door that was SUPER Quiet door…
I WANT to know WHEN someone enters my area…
No money?? Easy, you cant spend you cash UNLESS you are in the federation, otherwise you have to trade goods…
7, seat belts?? NAW…Think of the time frame…You want seats that Auto rotate And change position with inertia…And console controls for the major functions AS the captains chair has.
5. Umm, ya…OK…And how many episodes did they show an errant Captain take over a ship and SCREW EVERYTHING UP…
6&3…
OK, and have you ever seen Lightning JUMP a circuit? Want to see it IN YOUR COMPUTER??
2. YEP, thats a good point, but also that ALL ship crew are Made NOT to have babies WHILE they are in space. Its an OLD subplot… its called, DO IT LIKE RABBITS for the next 5 years…
1. I dont need to talk about, as Bugs, isnt part of the federation..
Number one should have been Convoluted Plot Devices run amok.
Star Trek is the worst at using them to make a show end all nicey nice for next week.
Continuity is also bad. I’d rank that a number 2.
When you have a Romulan BOP bring down the shields fast as squat and some huge planet detroying log shoots and shoots and shoots and still can’t get those shields down, it make you wonder about the poor use of science behind the show. And when did neutrinos make for good communication devices??? Its rife with junk science and poor use of the ST lexicon.
Though the new Dr. Who is MUCH worse now than ST ever was about the lexicon of former show history!
Cursor_
Get a life people, its only suppose to be entertainment. I get enough reality in my day to day life without worrying about such matters.
#5 [Mr. Fusion]
Sure, some of the imagination in the sci-fi series will become reality, but most is just a natural evolution of existing products.
If you ain’t in StarFleet, you ain’t sh*t.
Star Trek sucks! I would not say that. I simply watched the show for enjoyment. It hooked into my love of space.
If you’ve ever seen a blooper reel, you’ll know that the really funny stuff happens when the doors don’t go WHEET. Nothing like Bill Shatner’s flattened nose to make one LOL. [About 4 mins]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JZAkGfJY05k
Well, you folks finally got me to admit that Bush sucks, but that wasn’t good enough for you, was it? Now you’re attacking my beloved Star Trek/TOS… 😉
I liked the one about Firefly, featuring Serenity, the only Starship with commodes, or at least in the Captain’s cabin.
13 [Frank IBC] – Now you’re attacking my beloved Star Trek/TOS…
We aren’t. 😉
#14
Plus Firefly has a healthy hooker.
Okay, here’s 10 reasons Star Trek rules:
1.- They can cure Cancer.
2.- They regenerate your limbs.
3.- High quality health care for everyone.
4.- Fat people get laid.
5.- Robots get laid.
6.- Cyborgs get laid.
7.- Holograms get laid.
8.- Old people get laid.
9.- Interspecies sex is okay.
10.- Padme Amidala would do a 3some with Anakin Skywalker & Jar Jar Binks and no one would care.
#17…Angel…..uhhhhh, wasn’t that Star Wars????? 🙂
absolutely hated Shatner and can barely get through the show when he’s in it. But, the video was kind of funny BubbaRay
18,
Damn. Just when I thought we could find some common ground….
😉
Damn, I was expecting another ‘lame list’ but that boy’s right on the money! More laughs than I’ve had all week.
Of course it’s considerably less funny when the target is TNG, the only Star Trek actually worth watching… :/
Oh yeah – he’s funny, but somebody needs to tell him and about 20 million other non-label-reading sheeple that fucking WD-40 is a Water Dispersant, NOT a lubricant! X on a stick, both hands bloody!
[off topic]
#20, Lauren, wish your old comment link had actually led somewhere (Re: Skeptic). The other link was fine and a good read.
http://www.dvorak.org/blog/?p=12708#comment-717345
I still miss Gene Roddenberry. Thank goodness D.C. Fontana is still around. For the real ST fans, I’ll bet you’ve been here (with me and Alix):
http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Main_Page
http://www.startrek.com/startrek/view/index.html
CAUTION — If you’re not a Star Trek fan, don’t bother to click the above links.
“4. A Star Trek quiz:
Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and ‘Ensign Gomez’ beam down to a planet. Which one isn’t coming back?”
LAWL!
Thats the truest statement in that whole list. Is it just me or did it seem like at least 400 crewmembers would die per episode? Like, almost every episode they would get hit by a photon torpedo, and Riker would say “Sir theres a breach on decks 16, 24, and 32!” and La Forge would say “REVERSING POLARITY!” and then at the end of the episode you would find out that at least 400 crew members were shunted out into space.
Gotta love Star Trek 😀
Star Trek has never really been “science fiction”. I’ve always termed it “futuristic adventure”. If you’re looking for scientific accuracy or consistency, this was never the show. That’s part of what makes it so fun to poke holes in it.
My favorite is related to the lack of fuses mentioned in the list. The other half of that problem is that they seem to fun to full power of the reactors directly through the bridge controls, which is why they explode all the time. I know they don’t use “old fashioned electricity” but they must have the equivalent of transformers available. 😉
Real SF doesn’t sell well. Audiences want deathmatches with the creature of the week or shoot ’em ups.
That’s my #1 objection… I mean, I watched the original religiously as a young’un (even though I was already deeply into real SF), and in later years found that TNG >/i> was a pretty good show (enough so to make the original a camp joke), although I’ve never had the opportunity to get into DS9, Voyager or Enterprise.
So I say this as someone not predisposed to dis the show, but as iGW sez, it’s never really been science fiction, having virtually no science in it. Same for Star Wars.
And that would be small beer, indeed for those of us who enjoy it anyway, except that it has had a pernicious effect on a couple generations who now studiously avoid anything labeled ‘science fiction’ because that’s what they thought ST & SW was, and if they didn’t like them, they decided that all science fiction is crap…
So between Roddenberry and Lucas, millions of people who could’ve had their minds and imaginations stimulated by real SF have been completely turned off to it, and are duller, drabber people for it, with all the subtle consequences for Western society that that entails. 🙁
Man, whats with all the dated posts? This is at least 4 years old, just like the captain Picard song; I remember seeing that ages ago.
Maybe Star Trek is cheesy in some ways, ok, a lot of ways. But for those of us that actually sat and watched the original episodes it was as high-frigging-tech as you could get at the time, for no other reason than it was one of the first shows, IN COLOR. You just didn’t notice the flatulant doors. You were too busy being awe-struck by seeing hot space chicks with beehives in velour bodysuits. Again, these were the early days when color tv options were limited to Bonaza, that Sunday night Disney thing and Bob Barker opening doors. I will always believe that only because of those bodysuits, our best minds were inspired to produce really valuable technology, like Spandex.
Lauren – Have you read Snow Crash by Neil Stephensen?
#18
I’m just pointing out that in the Star wars universe even a boner is a nono for Jedis whereas in the Star Trek universe if it responds to your insinuations you might as well f*ck it.
#31 – Right on!
Star Trek Rules – Haters Drool!