Oh my god, the horror!
The City of Keizer is taking heat for installing a group of cement posts designed to protect pedestrians from cars, but which some say is a phallic symbol.
A total of 52 of the posts were installed at a busy intersection in Keizer and they are getting a lot of second glances.
A number of residents have complained to the city that the posts resemble male genitalia.
The city is looking into retrofitting the posts with metal collars and chains that run between them, which they hope will change the look. If not, they said the posts will have to go.
“If that fix doesn’t work and I still think they look inappropriate, we’ll have wasted $20,000 and we’ll have to do something different,” Eppley said.
“After” from Melissa McEwen.
Do you think its the phallic symbolism or the fact there are three of them together and the homophobic citizens don’t want to encourage any gay partying?
Standard parking meters are phallic. Hotdogs and banannas too. I thought Oregon was smarter than this?
I say remove them entirely and let the knuckleheads get hit by cars!
These are standard designs for cement posts. I’ve seen them before in different major US cities. The citizens in Keizer, Oregon are nuts. (insert joke here)
Rakarich
Retrofit with metal collars and chains?
They’re no more phallic than a can of soda. Anyone who complains that they look like phalluses may not have seen very many.
You would have to have a perverted mind to look at those and say they resemble penises.
I guess they should ban other phallic stuff like microphones, sausage, long baloons, and joysticks.
They should have put fountains in them that would go off periodically in indeterminate directions.
If I am not mistaken those “Penises” are made in China.
They can be seen in many Chinese cities such as Qingdao where I was just last week. In the past I have asked many Chinese about them and they don’t see them as penises even though the male Chinese culture is penis-centric.
Chinese penis-centricity:
In China there is popular alcoholic liquor whose name translates as “Three Penis Wine”. I suppose it makes the one work as three…(?)
There are so many Chinese food dishes which are reported to be good for “the little brother” such as turtle soup. (Chinese usually refer to their penis as their ‘little brother’)
Of course there are a lot of traditional Chinese medicines to grant god-like powers to the little brother – and they are not cheap!
In every Chinese city there are what my wife and I call “Naughty (hair) Salons”. They resemble a hair salon but it would take them forever to find a pair of scissors. Think of these places as a gym for the little brother – shooting hoops so to speak. They are EVERYWHERE!
Dead giveaways for these types of Hair Salons are the pretty girls sitting in the window and usually dimmer lighting – usually pink.
The irony of this is the Chinese government has a very strict policy of cleaning up the internet of all porn. Perhaps the logic of the Chinese is if you are hungry don’t waste time looking at cook books. 😉
Coming back to the stone penises, even if Chinese thought they looked like penises they would not even care – to them it’s a “so what?” what harm is there? But to Americans (with all the porn on the internet)…look out! There is an irony here too…me thinks…
Cheers
They look like R2-D2s to me.
Are we certain Keizer wasn’t settled by people from Kansas?
I work in an office with 48 other people. There are 4 women and two men that consistently complain about things being in a sexual manner. We work in a programming design and development shop so I often wonder where these people have their heads at, certainly not on programming. I was written up once after making a comment that one lady should be thinking of work instead of sex after she made a stupid comment. I told the manager she was supporting the idiot by accepting her views instead of focusing on our work.
That looks more like R2-D2. I guess he’s a phallic symbol too..
The problem is the people who think everything looks like a sex organ!
Sex on the brain these people have. Sad very sad!
For the record:
Those are CONCRETE posts.
Cement is one component of concrete. So is sand, and gravel, and water.
They’re not water posts, they’re not gravel posts, they’re not sand posts, they’re not cement posts, they’re CONCRETE posts.
Ditto for your sidewalk, the blocks the foundation of your house is made out of, parking decks, piers, buildings, walls, etc.
CONCRETE.
#1, no, they are probably ultra-feminist lesbians who are offended by anything that reminds them of boys’ icky parts.
This just shows how fucked-up and repressed sexually so many people in the “red states” are. It is a fault of our society. if you are raised thinking the naked human body is dirty and perverse, you will have a dirty and perverse attitude towards sex.
It’s sad enough that there are enough sexually obsessed / frustrated women in that town (I’ll guarantee that every one of the complainers is), but for the local govt to cave in to such idiocy is pathetic. A better response would be to offer the complainers a list of local psychotherapists.
BTW, they look almost exactly like some very popular and common commercial trash receptacles that have been around for at least 40 years. These people don’t get out much, methinks.
We need to close down Arches National park also, this is disgusting.
http://tinyurl.com/2nosrz
Reminds me of a guy I heard about in Wagga Wagga nicknamed “Jam jar” – you can figure it out (No, it’s not rhyming slang).
M0les.
#17, when did Oregon become a “red state”?
#15 thanks for (pardon the pun) setting the record straight, i can only hope we can cure the perverts who think everything looks like a sex organ.
but i have be the first to say this: now that’s what i call a hard-on!
sry, couldn’t help myself
21,
Good catch. I guess I express predjudices about attitudes sometimes. I apologize.
I did say “our society”.
So when some crybaby from The First Church Of Bible Thumping Jack-Asses complains that a barrier looks like a penis, the city placates them.
The correct answer is…
“You know, you are right, they do kinda look like penises if you think about it… But they also protect pedestrians and they cost a lot of money, so I think we’ll keep them they way they are.”
“But we are self-righteous prudes. Those barriers offend us.”
“Oh… I’m sorry. I never imagined they could offend someone. Silly me. Well, here is a map of the downtown area. With this map you can plan alternate routes that will allow you to avoid having to see the offensive barriers.”
That’s how you address that…
#8.. THAT’S WHY THEY ARE SO SMALL
They’re complaining because they’re brown phalli, if they were pasty white, then the male citizens wouldn’t feel insecure about it.
Now if you paint the stems black… Then there would be the first time white men will riot on the streets.
Oh, let’s see……
They are complaining because they don’t measure up.
They are complaining because the CONCRETE is too rough and might cause an injury (use your imagination).
They are complaining because they don’t come with a supply of “trash bag condoms” at the ready.
They are complaining because there are only three of them.
When they should be complaining that the city didn’t plant some water melon plants at the bases, just to make things look more real.
You have to understand that Keizer is located right next to Salem, the state capital. ‘neuf said.
#7 They should have put fountains in them that would go off periodically…
Better yet, install drinking fountains – like the “Benson Bubblers” in Portland, OR – so it would look like people were doing something really interesting.
http://www.portlandground.com/archives/2005/07/boy_drinks_from.php
I LOVe dirty minds,
They are so much fun to play with…
I would ask the group complaining…
1. THEN YOU DESIGN a good reasonable priced device for protection.
2. Your Thoughts SHOW what you are thinking about. Go get laid.
These people have way too much imagination. Sometimes a group of cement posts designed to protect pedestrians from cars, is just a group of cement posts designed to protect pedestrians from cars.
S. Freud
email Mr. Eppley and tell him what a dolt he is.
eppleyc@keizer.org
They don’t look at ALL LIKE penis’. They look like bullets.
Big deal.
It would be funny, and maybe worth it, to remove the offending symbollic barriers and replace them with genuine concrete accurate penises.
Then maybe men could get some respect for protecting society.