Robots deserve hell too…
And it just doesn’t get the jokes… So far to go still…

Betty: Welcome to HP Chat, we have several teams to assist you based on your needs today. Do you already have this product or are you looking for assistance before you purchase?
Guest: i have a question regarding the HP LaserJet 9040 Printer series- models
Betty: Do you already have HP 9040 printer series or are you looking for assistance before you purchase?
Guest: I notice it has multiple output trays… Can a tray be assigned to an individual user? And yes, we are looking to purchase a printing solution after discovery.
Betty: Glad to assist you with getting you transferred to a specialist on the products you are looking at.
Betty: Will you be reselling this product?
Guest: No. Just recommending it.
Betty: Are you an educational, military, healthcare or state/local institution that receives government funding?
Guest: No. I’m a human.
Betty: Thank you for the information and your patience. Please hold a moment while I transfer you to a specialist now.
Betty: As our chat queue for our experts are high, this may take a few minutes.
Betty: Before I transfer you…
Betty: may I ask what country you will be using this product in?
Guest: Soviet Cannuckistan
Betty: Thanks for the information



  1. Mac Guy says:

    Too much time on your hands…

  2. Fred Flint says:

    Isn’t there an printer embargo for Soviet Cannuckistan or has that been lifted because of all the oil?

  3. mark says:

    Actually I thought the robot did quite well, under the circumstances.

  4. rantsh says:

    AI… not!!!!

  5. OhForTheLoveOf says:

    Online and telephone based automated help systems..

    I wonder how much it costs to develop lackluster AIs, voice recognition, the hardware infrastructure, maintenance, the IT staff to support it, tech writers to develop content for online, and everything else that goes into it… Factor in lost sales from customer frustration and all the other possible impacts to the bottom line…

    All this just to avoid paying a few community college students a modest wage to provide a real human contact.

    It is worth it? In the short run? In the long run?

  6. Mister Justin says:

    1,

    Hey! I need a multi-output-tray printer! HP Ai bot was there to help… sort of…

    Should I head over to the Apple store and get what they offer instead?

  7. Mister Justin says:

    3,

    But it didn’t get the jokes! Granted, they were of poor quality, but still. I expect more in 200*.

  8. MacBandit says:

    I’m convinced that some of the voice recognition programs that phone and other companies use is bogus. On one occasion I was doing a 411 search and after saying the location I was looking for the operator came on and asked me to repeat that because she didn’t hear it the first time. I think they’re using these systems to prevent idle chat and human interaction. It may save time on businesses part but it sure doesn’t improve customer satisfaction.

  9. mark says:

    7. Mister Justin, there was only one (bad) joke in there. The other could be construed as a wise crack (No, I’m a human), and the machine responded like every HP tech support person I have ever spoken to, with the miniumum of human emotion or empathy. Come to think of it, maybe they are all fucking robots.

  10. KVolk says:

    Automated systems make sense to accountants thats why they exist. Humans have on going costs associated with their employment and outomated systems have only intial costs and maintenance. There is no way to “account” for the quality of the experience so it is factored out. Which of course blows…..

  11. laineypie says:

    i work on the phone in my office so after doing it all day every day people say i sound like a robot. i myself hate automated systems. the 411 ppl let you go through the auto system if its something easy but when the auto doesnt recognize there are still people there to back them up.

  12. tallwookie says:

    Hell is other Robots

  13. TJGeezer says:

    12 – LOL – Hey, you gotta stop misquoting Sartre. It makes you look intellecshual. 🙂


0

Bad Behavior has blocked 6331 access attempts in the last 7 days.