I personally believe that The Ark and other flood legends (every society has one) stem from the massive climate change at the end of the pleistocene. Any civilization in existence at that time would have been destroyed, and survivors would have many stories of what happened. Undoubtedly some prepared for the flooding and destruction by building such ships. I just don’t think they were divinely inspired. (Beyond simply “Oh my God I’d better build something to save my people from the shitstorm that’s coming down”.)
The massive central door in the side of Noah’s Ark was thrown open Saturday — you could say it was the first time in 4,000 years — drawing a crowd of curious pilgrims and townsfolk to behold the wonder. Of course, it’s only a replica of the biblical Ark, built by Dutch creationist Johan Huibers as a testament to his faith in the literal truth of the Bible.
Reckoning by the old biblical measurements, Johan’s fully functional ark is 150 cubits long, 30 cubits high and 20 cubits wide. That’s two-thirds the length of a football field and as high as a three-story house.
Life-size models of giraffes, elephants, lions, crocodiles, zebras, bison and other animals greet visitors as they arrive in the main hold.
I wonder if the ship model also handles the sewage and feed issue (water is obviously taken care of, at least for the first 40 days)?
For some strange reason, the only thing I picture being there inside that Ark are ppl in loinclothes dancing at the rhythm of Madonna’s music.
“Global warming camp”? You mean, like an invading army of “ecology freaks”? You mean, like, all the scientists on Earth who don’t work for Exxon-Mobil?
“And the Lord said, take your son up to an altar, tie him up [you don’t think he was holding still for the knife, did you?] and stab him for me in my most holy name . Whoops! I was only kidding, you passed the test. And the kid, who cares, he’s damned gerbil in my psychotic eyes. Another little soldier of Me. He’s traumatized? FU! I like ’em that way! Hit him a few times for ol’ Yaweh!”
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And the most holy man saw that the crowd outside was fixin’ to tear the angels in his home apart, so he sayeth to the crowd, “Here are my prepubescent daughters. Take ’em away and do what you want, they’re pretty hot, considering they’re 11 and 9, but please leave this Angel – ahem – random traveller alone.” And they Lord’s rep said, “You’re pretty Godly, son. Too bad about the kids. You can always make more.”
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And the Lord said to Joshua, “Go down into that city. Kill and torture all the men. Make sex slaves of the women, and impregnate them all. Make every one of the little kids slaves. And please rinse and repeat until all of Canaan is annihilated and you get all the women pregnant and weeping and all the kids chained to your mangers, cleaning your loincloths. And burn everything, I like that fine. For I am the LORD. And kill some more livestock and burn it, I’m a bit peckish.”
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This is the morality that the Bible teaches us. These were the holiest of the favored of God. What exactly did this supernatural psycho have to teach us? And Jesus believed every word of it, so, please, don’t say things changed when brought the good word of a reformed psycho god.
23: It might be hilarious, but they are armed, heavily represented in the officer class of the military, hold the Executive Branch hostage along with 100K nukes, and they don’t like you very much.
3: to answer your question as a kid: Kid, Chewbacca. The story isn’t about the animals. The story is about doing what the priests tell you to do, or you will drown with your pet puppy Snuffles, because GOD LOVES YOU, except when he has his little moments. Go to bed, and beg him not to kill you and your puppy. This is religion in a nutshell.
Consider the earth is a closed system, no water leaves or enters, the Earth obviously cannot be flooded in its entirety. Even if the entire south pole melted, it “only” raises the global water level by 200 meters.
It’s amazing how people think they are enlightened because they hear parts of stories, and never really study them like a real scientist, but go around claiming how “scientific” and smart they are when it comes to Biblical stories and how unbelievable they are. You are really no different than the typical ignorant Christian sitting in church on Sunday. Instead you sit in a college classroom and listen to teachers tell you their version and you accept it just as blindly. The fact that so many actually believe evolution is a testament to that.
#37
> The fact that so many actually believe evolution is a
> testament to that.
Riiiiigght. You mean just like those crazy people that say that the Earth is not flat and that the theory of gravity is accurate?
OK, let’s see how this works out.
The universe, God’s universe, appears to work by rules, laws and other restrictions or allowances. These rules, laws etc are constant and are not open to change. Why? Because God MADE them that way. If it has already established that a worldwide flood is impossible given the rules and laws of God’s physical universe (which remember, were put in place BY God) then we must accept that 1) God would create a situation which ignores the rules and laws which He has put in place; this opens up everything, science, Biblical stories open for interpretation, OR 2) there was no worldwide flood because God’s consistent rules and laws would not allow for such an occurrence.
So what is it? Can/will God set aside immutable laws which He alone created and put in place, as discovered by modern science (which truly exists primarily to discover more about God’s universe) and therefore leaves all knowledge and history (Biblical included) open for interpretation OR do we understand that the ordered universe as set by God cannot be changed and therefore the story of Noah and a worldwide flood is just a story, a tale, a parable or an exaggeration used to explain a weather occurrence for which men of Noah’s limited understanding but teaches good moral or religious lessons.
Which is it?
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me. It is high. I cannot attain unto it.
Psalm 139
I’d rather be a fool in the eyes of man than a fool in the eyes of God.
Ok, I don’t understand all those people saying it is impossible. You must consider that:
1) God put the Universe in play, so he knows the rules better than anyone. What if he used the set up of the Universe to alter something in the Universe to where the flood would happen. Even though the Universe was created with set rules, that cannot be changed, there is still a great deal of uncertainty in the universe. If I am wrong, please comment…
2) This event didn’t take place today, it took place many years ago. If you even partially believe in the theory of evolution, than you would agree that back then, there wouldn’t have been half the species we have today. Many would have died out since the dinosaurs (including the dinosaurs) and few species would have survived.
3) When the meteor (if you believe this most likely true theory) crashed and killed the dinosaurs, it would have had a huge impact. This would have had enough force, if it hit in the correct place, to raise the seas. There are many “meteors that wiped out the Dinosaurs”. What if there WERE two. Then one could have hit on land, and caused enough dust to block out the sun and kill the dinosaurs, while the other could have hit many years later in very deep water, causing a massive tsunami (or flood) which could have caused this event.
If God caused something to alter the path of this projectile to where it would have hit when he told Noah it would hit, then he could have told Noah to build this massive ark. Then the story of Noah and the ark could have come true.