Why didn’t somebody get him some help?
Christmas had almost passed, and you were breathing a sigh of relief.. because you had gotten through the holiday, and Dvorak Uncensored hadn’t posted.. yes.. you know.. THAT letter from Virginia. Well, as the hours count down toward midnight, I am posting this in the evening for the sole purpose of ruining your whole day. Bwaaaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
“DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
“Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
“Papa says, ‘If you see it in THE SUN it’s so.’
“Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?“VIRGINIA O’HANLON.
“115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET.”VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.
Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! How dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus! It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.
Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.
You tear apart the baby’s rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest man that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding. No Santa Claus! Thank GOD! He lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.
And to all a good night…
Cynical, you may be. I remember I time before irony.
Merry Christmas everybody!
Ahh yes, the time before irony, that was nice … how long ago was that … (and I’m not old at all ….)
…I remember I time before irony…
It was very bronze-y.
The dental was awful.
And all the beer tasted like Schmidt’s.
Virginia’s father was actually a coroner’s assistant in Manhattan. He should have just told her, “Sorry honey, but I performed Santa’s autopsy just last week. His liver gave out after many years of hard drinking.” Instead, he taught his little girl to believe everything printed in The Sun.
I would argue that my suggestion might be less harmful.
I was wondering when that would show up here – suprisingly enough I mentioned this to somone at work the other day and they had no idea wtf i was talking about.