CD REVIEWS — This is one of the weirdest CD reviews I’ve ever seen. I think he is trying to make a point. It’s almost as if the reviewer was told not to say anything bad. So he didn’t.

PARIS HILTON

The donkey not only has longer ears than the horse but also typically eats much less. Also, its fur is not waterproof. The domesticated animal, Equus asinus, can defend itself with a powerful kick from its hind legs. While present in early American society, the donkey’s popularity was not widespread until the Gold Rush, thanks to its social disposition and ability to carry tools. Many people consider the donkey a cute and comical animal, but it has a reputation for being stubborn. A popular German proverb contends that a donkey can dress up in a lion suit, but its ears will always stick out and reveal its true identity. The donkey is helpful in herding sheep, cattle or goats. The animal is also commonly known as a jackass, burro, jennet, hinny and ass. It has a loud, brassy voice that goes, “Hee-haw! Hee-haw! Hee-haw!”

— Aidin Vaziri
PARIS HILTON
PARIS
WARNER BROS.

found by Rick Salsman



  1. Peter Garner says:

    “a donkey can dress up in a lion suit, but its ears will always stick out and reveal its true identity.”

    Seems pretty clear to me.

  2. Jägermeister says:

    When brain transplants become the norm in the future, Paris Hilton’s brain will be the most pricey. Been installed, but never used.

  3. NONAME says:

    Was I supposed to read the review, D’oh! What would Homer Simpson say in the moments before having Free Donuts, that what I say.

  4. John says:

    Two Paris Hilton posts? Wasn’t there anything else better to post?

    Pretty lame.

  5. JohnnyM says:

    I bet the review is better than the album

  6. sdf says:

    Too bad we don’t see this kind of thing on hardware review sites. It seems to me these gear sites are pandered up the ass, much like our friend here

  7. Max Bell says:

    What gets into these people that they feel the urge to moonlight in a different profession? There ought to be an annual draft; a pro wrestler can take up a job acting, but only if a model takes up pro football, that kind of thing.

  8. GotoDengo says:

    Even better… a “guerilla artist” replacing Paris’s CD’s in British music stores with altered versions. A 45-min looping dance track with Paris saying dumb things. Probably an improvement.

    http://news.independent.co.uk/uk/this_britain/article1325440.ece

  9. John Schumann says:

    $18.98 ? None for me, thanks!

  10. joshua says:

    Lets face it….we know she didn’t stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

  11. Is that something thats lifted from like a description of a donkey or is it just some writing being strange?

  12. Mark says:

    Is that something thats lifted from like a description of a donkey or is it just some writing being strange?

  13. GregAllen says:

    I heard this review on the radio:

    “Paris Hilton’ s CD doesn’t suck as bad as we’d hoped.”

    I wonder if the record label will put that quote on the packaging!

  14. Dan says:

    So this is your second Pairs story up! are you starting to stalk her john? lol

  15. ECA says:

    AS I understand it…
    It was recently reported…
    That she said….
    she was STILL Virgin??

    must be GOOD BJ.

  16. #4 lame john..hey it’s about the review not Hilton. Get a clue. It’s funny.

    And #14 ..I didn;t do both posts. Cripes.

  17. Fabrizio Marana says:

    Hilarious!
    The funniest CD review I’ve read ever!

    Just a note on a sense of humour: to be able to see the funny side of things, you must have a certain level of intelligence, so if you don’t see the joke, don’t say anything; just move on to the next article…

    Oh, and the above statement is humorous, so if you’re offended, it just means you’re too dumb to understand, so don’t react to it, or you will show your stupidity…

    [Grin]

  18. John S says:

    Whenever Paris Hilton is mentioned I automatically think of The Simpsons Holloween episode where the giant signs come to life and Lisa has to right the song “Just don’t look”. The belief being that if ignored she will go away. Sadly I kinda know I would be like homer and look anyway. Which leads me to the next thought. Sometimes you have to laugh to keep from crying. If this “lady” is what we are suppose to aspire to be like then I just say relax and enjoy the ride. You know laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone. Just a thought.

    I agree with Mr. Marana. If you cannot see the humour in this maybe you ought to read a book or something. You know eat vitamins or something. Whatever you need to do to improve your intelligence. You will be happy when you see how funny some things really are. Laughter is good for your health too. 😉

    John

  19. Rick says:

    …or, if you can’t read a book, you could right one.

    😉

  20. Mike Cannali says:

    Paris is perhaps no less self-promoting, shallow and decadent than Madonna – but Madonna has a voice.


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