A Good friend sent this in today. Since there is no John Kerry, John Edwards or even George W. Bush gag here I have to assume it’s about 4 years old. So I’m thinking the readers of this blog should add a comment suggesting NEW viruses for Kerry and GW.

Viruses WARNING . . . Watch out for these new viruses – Neither Symantec or McAfee have any solutions for these yet!!!

The Al Gore Virus – Causes your computer to just keep counting and re-counting.

The Clinton Virus – Gives you a 7-inch Hard Drive with NO memory.

The Bob Dole (aka Viagra) Virus – Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy.

The Lewinsky Virus – Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did.

The Ronald Reagan Virus – Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored.

The Mike Tyson Virus – Quits after two bytes.

The Oprah Winfrey Virus – Your 300 Mb hard drive shrinks to 100 Mb, then slowly expands to re-stabilize around 200 Mb.

The Jack Kevorkian Virus – Deletes all old files.

The Ellen Degeneres Virus – Disks can no longer be inserted.

The Prozac Virus – Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn’t care.

The Joey Buttafuoco Virus – Only attacks minor files.

The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus – Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back.

AND THE FAVORITE

The Lorena Bobbitt Virus – Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy . then discards it through Windows